sung to the ‘Twelve Days of Christmas’

On the first hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
A warmer for my wood i.e

On the second hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the third hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the fourth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the fifth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two  bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.


On the sixth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the seventh hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the eighth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me 
Eight  mash’  niblicking
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.


On the ninth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Nine lags-up layin’
Eight mash’  niblicking
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the tenth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Ten flags-up lipping
Nine lag-ups layin’
Eight mash’ niblicking
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.


On the eleventh hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Eleven sure tips poutines
Ten flags-up lipping
Nine lags-ups layin’
Eight mash’ niblicking
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the twelfth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
Twelve dogballs licked in
Eleven sure tips poutines
Ten flags-up lipping
Nine lags-up layin’
Eight mash’ niblicking
Seven strokes a-spraying
Six grips, a Vardon
Five Golden Bears
Four hard stiff shanks
Three FOR skins
Two bare lie balls
And a warmer for my wood i.e.

On the thirteenth hole at Pinehurts
My golf pro gave to me
My money back.