I've been wondering for some time,
how do I release myself,
from the broken shell
that was my life?
I've been desperately searching,
for an easy way out,
of this guilty sorrow
that has engulfed my life.

Then I realised that the only
way to forgive myself,
was to justify myself,
I'm not blaming myself anymore.
I realise that I was wrong,
but it wasn't just me, was it?
If you can dare to point,
at me, then let me just say this...

I can't count the number
of messages you left,
saying:
'so sorry',
'can't come',
'see you next time',
I can't count the times
you avoided
me,
my eyes,
and my questions.

So ok, I admit to you,
the things I did were wrong,
but I can't keep dragging myself
over those saddened memories,
that burn like coals in hellfire
when I was often the one
who was crying...

__________________________________________

I think, that when you're just getting ready to look back, and drag up all the things that have hurt you, when you're just getting ready to beg for acceptance, stand up, and remember where you're going, not where you've been. If people aren't prepared to stand by you, they aren't worth the trouble. *x-Charley-x*