I HAD A DREAM the other night
In which no one pushed me and no one shoved me
A dream in which I was kicked and beaten by no one
I dreamt as I slept of a setting in which
I was savagely stabbed and bludgeoned
By no one
I am writing now of a terrible nightmare whose strength to tell
Has in me just arisen
In which upon me, no one laid a finger
I was touched by no one
Startled by my vision, I bolted up from a tremoring bed
Desperately searching with hopes not to find
When I saw, not in the corner, but with the whole of my eye
That I stood face to face
With no one herself

This poem/personal ad was about as much a practical failure as the other I have reprinted here, considering that only one of four respondents thought its author was male. It too is contained in my groundbreaking work, "Monstrous: The Autobiography of a Serial Killer but for the Grace of God".