When it creeps in and the light wanes...

If I could throw away this madness
that has flawed my soul so deep…
I’d savor every golden moment
praying God my soul to keep.

For when it smothers me in sadness
it’s my heart that skips a beat…
While I cannot unmask its darkness
into self I must retreat.

As if the sun could not embrace me
for the clouds become my shroud…
Alone I wander in the coldness
far away from life and crowd.

For just a moment I can taste it
like a drug that numbs the mind…
Familiar tangle in the cobwebs
‘till my will it has confined.

Becomes the monster I can’t tame
that prowls and goes straight for the vein…
Until the silence is too loud for me
to bear its weight of pain.

Yet fight I will though it may conquer
I shall never cease to try…
I will not give away my hope
nor just allow my soul to die.