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Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie

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Member Since: Sep, 2002

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The Unbelievers...
by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie → (All Poetry by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie)
  
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Dark Poetry...


In the dim moonlight…
I listen to the
Lovely songs of entropy,
Play with her stars,
Causing them to fall
Like tear drops from the
Sad face of God…

He wanders to her,
With lust in his heart,
But she sends him away,
Wanting no part of his lies,
And false promises,
And he cries,
This God,
With no children of his own,
So he sneaks into your heart,
And makes it his home…

Lovely Entropy,
Strums her harp,
With broken nails,
Her fingers scared
By much abuse…
Too many souls hanging on,
Refusing to let go,
Afraid of falling,
Of leaving unknown…

In the gardens of hell,
I watch them both,
He weeping,
She singing,
And he moves to her music,
His stiff soul swaying to her rhythm…

I watch and wait for the song to end,
Knowing that he will never leave,
Trying to make her believe,
That his dreams were real…
But he has lost me,
As she is lost to him-
As we are lost to them,
We unbelievers in Gods,
We of little faith,
Knowing the world is false,
And his promises like all men’s,
A thing he says,
To get her in his bed…

Alas,
I alone see
The dead God dancing,
In the maze of eternity,
Under the dim moonlight,
In the gardens of hell,
Where I dwell…

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 Reviews of "The Unbelievers..."
Reviewed by Bonnie Torrente
Reviewed on May 26, 2003
RD, I'm amazed at your writing ability and your imagination. TY
Bonnie

Reviewed by Victoria Murray
Reviewed on May 26, 2003
What a fabulous poet you are! I loved this one. Thanks for posting it!

Hugs,

Victoria

Reviewed by Bhuwan Thapaliya
Reviewed on May 20, 2003
Lovely write....you are very talented....love n luck...BHUWAN

Reviewed by Susan Cook-Jahme (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
This is so lovely Reindeer -
Alas I alone see the dead God dancing....

Reviewed by jude forese
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
interesting how matter and energy degrade...

Reviewed by Lady Peg (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Reindeer,
Oh this one is so beautifu
I sat at your foot of the poem and listened
to the harps.
"Lovely Entropy,
Strums her harp,
With broken nails,
Her fingers scared
By much abuse…
Too many souls hanging on,
Refusing to let go,
Afraid of falling,
Of leaving unknown"
never stop writing
Peggy

Reviewed by Josephine Bohen
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Retta,
Was drawn in and held fast
Thank you
josie

Reviewed by Nancy D.
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Well done, quite a switch for you.

Nancy

Reviewed by the phantom pheonix (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
this was so fantastically dark and morbid and I loved the personification of Entropy she was so cool awesome job on this poem

Reviewed by Rodney Bohen
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Retta,
My sister we stay busy do we not? Yes, our secret indeed...Keep inking the parchment.
Peace,Oh good piece! I actually adored most of it! Perhaps all....I smile in retreat...
Rodney Evan Bohen

In the dim moonlight…
I listen to the
Lovely songs of entropy,
Play with her stars,
Causing them to fall
Like tear drops from the
Sad face of God…

Reviewed by Ron (sketchman) Axelson (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
You amaze me too.......
Darker than dark.........

Reviewed on May 19, 2003
(((eindeer))) feelin' a bit dark, are we?? haunting, but beautiful, write...even though hell isn't beautiful...i don't think...i don't wanna find out LOL...i hope light shines upon you soon...(((HUGS))) and love, karla. :(

Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Brilliant, Retta. How do you do it over and over and over. Amazing woman.

Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
'Twas a tad dark,
in the gardens of hell.......

Reviewed by jing javier
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
agree with tony!

Reviewed by Tony Nerone (Reader)
Reviewed on May 19, 2003
Dear Retta, Nothing but the very best written by you always!!

tony


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