Oh what will I do now

I just can’t imagine it somehow

You told me just the other day

I’d be just fine

But how can that be

I don’t have you to guide me

What sign should I look for

How should I begin to heal

The part of my life that I shared with you

The stories and secrets we told

The minutes, hours and days we stole

I know what I’ve seen

I know how serene

Wondering why you got to go first

When it’s me who had such a thirst

To go back to the other side

Everyone leaves me

I dread getting close

I know my mission

The Lord explained his vision

But after all, I think he may have picked the wrong one

To try and ease their fears

Take away their tears

And hold their hand

To the promise land

For most they just smile or nod

Thinking I’m some weird blond

No matter my clarity

Or sincerity

Your word they often don’t hear

Only their inner message, a lifetime of fears

I often think I’m too weak

To continue talking about what they don’t seek

I try to stay strong

To promote the message you sent along

but in flesh and blood form, I often think of my wants

Weakening to my inner taunts

Dear Lord can I come home yet?