"If I need you in order to be somebody, then
I am nobody without you."
To be nobody but yourself means fighting
the good fight and never stop fighting. This
is a fight worth fighting.
The fight for the private life is the battle of
a lifetime. Without the private life a person
cannot achieve self-discovery, advance toward
soul-completion and possess spirit-potential
God-consciousness.
"The idol of togetherness" is the chief culprit
of private life. An idol is an image represen-
tation of a small "g" god rather than the capital
"G" God. Togetherness is not only or just
being together physically; it is acceptance
of being connected to other people, having
the feeling of dependency on them and being
controlled by them, especially by what they
do which may include the noise from an
airplane soaring in the sky.
To make an "idol of togetherness" is to
make it the substitute for God. Authority
derived from and invested in togetherness
influences and determines the choices an
individual makes.
When a person's private life becomes his
public life and public-transparency preempts
self-transparency the indivudal knows less about
himself than the public knows about him. But
even then the individual longs for a private
life where he can be, know, and own himself.
Every person has the ability to defend himself
against the invasion of assault on his privacy.
He can discover himself, grow, increase in
knowledge, wisdom and understanding. He can
in solitude, contemplation and prayer, "entering
into the closet to pray," as Jesus puts it, become
accepting of his individuality and child-Father
relationship with God. It is then that he will
know that he is somebody, without the approval
of others. He will no longer be a stranger in his
own home or feel defenseless against the
intrusion of those who are determine to make
him" somebody other than himself.
It is in this way of being that life becomes private
without self-centeredness or arrogance, that the
prisoner is set free; he is saved and able to invest
in himself, be in charge of himself and take
responsibility for the choices he makes and the
consequences of his choices. Now his actions
are motivated by "I do not love you because
I need you; I need you becuse I can love you."
Now it is no longer what you can do with and
for me; it is what I can do with and for you.
Having one's private life is a matter of ultimacy.
Copyright 2014 by Urih J. Fields
Ron