Well Pilgrims, here is first post from my new Reconditioned Dell. Any of you "Old Timers" out there in Cyberland who remember our Dear Old Friend, Elizabeth Lucas-Taylor, she & her Hubby, Gaylen, were the Donors of this gift. They live in Arizona, have battled some sickness, like many of us Old Farts, and I know they both wish you All well.
I have no uploaded Pics here yet, to be able to post, all in due time...
Of this Writing I shall Attempt ...
To Mimic a Knave of Great Contempt.
Knave Knumb Knutz ... aka ‘Wuss-A-Lot’ Matlack ...
Who Lacks Knowledge of Proper Language, in Fact!
This Joisey Devil who Dwells Out in The Barrens ...
Is an Un-Ed-ju-ma-cated Dolt in his Environs!
He Wouldn’t Know a “Dangling Participle” ...
If’n it Bit Him on the Arse!
This is, of Course ... ‘cause He’s so Coarse!
Most of His Penultimate ‘Pens’ ...
Are Done ‘Bass-Ackwards’ ...
With Mis-Placed Prepositional Phrases ...
Hanging like Pteradactyls!
Proper Nouns: Persons, Places, and Things ...
Are Not Capitalized ... more like ‘Wing-Dings’!
Of Punctuation ... He has Not a Clue ...
Commas, Colons, Periods ... These He Doth Eschew!
To Parse, or Diagram a Sentence ...
Is Beyond His Comprehension ...
So ... He Oft’ Leaves Adjectives n’ Adverbs ...
Mangled in Suspension!
Oh ... Do Let me State ...
Ere I Be Remiss ...
We All Do Love This Dunce ...
Agape Love ... With a Breath-Blown Kiss!
His Rhetorical ‘Oratories’ Can Be Quite Verbose ...
Rarely Ever Eloquent ...
As He Sits n’ Types on His Double-Wide Caboose!
Oh ... as an ‘Aside’ ... Edward “The Lesser” ...
Thinks He is an Expert Fisherman ...
Blessed by The Creator ...
But ... In Fact ... He is Just a “Master-Baiter”!
Back to ‘Language’ ... Which He Mostly Abuses ...
While Criticizing Others ... He Oft’ Accuses!
Incorrect Verbs ... in Awkward Tenses ...
These are More ... Of His Offenses ...
Present - Past - Future ... To Him ... Matter Not ...
He Just ‘Screws Them Up’ ... Quite A Lot!
How Do We Love Him?
Let Me Count The ‘Lays’ ...
Convoluted Verses ...
Oft’ Penned ... Not Unlike a Maze!
So ... Hail to Thee ... Matchless Matlack ...
Afore I Loosen Up the Slack ...
As the Jersey Barrens’ Devil’s Disciple ...
Please Go Learn About ... A Dangling Participle!
Incorrect Verbs ... in Awkward Tenses ...
These are More ... Of His Offenses ...
Present - Past - Future ... To Him ... Matter Not ...
He Just ‘Screws Them Up’ ... Quite A Lot!
Except for the glaring capitalization--your trademark--I find this erudite description of the Joisey Devil's masterful writing, write on. You threw me back into my extensive English language courses for a moment. Sure glad I left them behind and started writing. Ol'e Ed never have those courses in the first place, so he's learning English bass act words.
You sure know him well! But you are his cousin after all. And speaking of family, our dear old Ma has a big favor to ask of you tonight. She fears that he will be dangling something far worse than participles tonight. Please read my post this morning.
This programmed, self-paced lesson focuses exclusively on the use of postpostions (ga and (w)o) with grammatical objects in the Japanese language without wavering or getting off track in the labyrinth of Japanese syntax and other grammatical issues.
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Regis
Love ya!
Jane
These are More ... Of His Offenses ...
Present - Past - Future ... To Him ... Matter Not ...
He Just ‘Screws Them Up’ ... Quite A Lot!
Some lika my Engimsh when I dwrink.
Love the poem!
Chip Bergeron
Ron
You sure know him well! But you are his cousin after all. And speaking of family, our dear old Ma has a big favor to ask of you tonight. She fears that he will be dangling something far worse than participles tonight. Please read my post this morning.
Thanks, Cuz.