My wonderful Mother-in-Law, Donna Mae Thompson passed away April 17, 2006. The picture above is of our last vacation to Colorado and this is at the Bed-and-Breakfast inn that we stayed at in Manatou Springs.

This is for my husband, Mark.

All Is Well
by Mendy Thompson
8/30/2006

How do you measure the loss of a spirit that was so bright?
How do you even know how to start being “normal” again?
How can holidays and even regular days ever be the same?
How do you know you are doing everything right?
How do you go on and try to measure up?
You are one of “her children” and a lot is expected of you…
How do you follow in those very large footsteps?
How can you stop wanting to pick up that phone for advice or just to chat?
How can you stop wanting to go visit?

When someone is more than average, more than the normal…
More giving, more caring, more generous to all others
Than anyone you have ever known…
(And not just because she was YOUR mother, but because she just WAS)
How do you move on with life?
How do you pretend all is well?

She gave her time, her energy, her heart and soul to all around her
She MADE time for anyone who needed attention
She made time to do all the necessary things; from large scale to very small…
Feeding people in need, heading fund raisers for the less fortunate
Making sure nobody spent holidays alone
Visiting people who were ill or hospitalized
Sitting with family when a loved one was dying
Making chicken soup and delivering it to the sick
Cooking huge meals to feed dozens of family and friends
Cooking huge meals to feed complete strangers
Coloring Easter eggs, decorating for Halloween
Making Christmas the most special that anyone could ever have
Making sure that ALL had gifts…(yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus!)
Santa visited that house every year and made even the adults believe
That he was truly there…That he was making a list and checking it twice
That he would make sure that everyone in the house had at least one gift
And that they felt special…for that one evening…if only for a moment…
Every year

And if the house was messy, that was never an issue
It was not one of the important things in life, no need to fret
What was important were the people that came through the doors
And the things that went on behind them
There was story telling; there was swimming and playing outside; there were imagination games
There was singing and laughing and hugging
There were crafts and coloring and decorating going on
There were shopping trips to the mall and to “Wal-Mark”
There was watching movies from a king-sized bed filled with 3 or 4 people
There were trips to the mountains…and to the beach…and to the woods
There were nights of looking at the stars and days of finding pictures in the clouds
There was bird-watching from the big cozy chair, looking out the picture window
There were sleepovers and making popcorn and baking and trying new recipes
There were church functions and church camp
And going on vacations and cruises with family members
...Talking to new people everywhere you went
Never meeting a stranger…being the first to smile and speak…initiating a conversation
Making everyone feel loved and not alone


Six little boys and husband...family and home to care for
And even after suffering the greatest loss a parent can endure
There was a positive attitude; there was still love for those that were alive and well
There was still a wonderful mother for the five other little boys
And later, love and care for the grandchildren and daughter-in-law left behind, and the four remaining sons
In her words, "because we have to celebrate that they had lived more than grieving that they had died”
Still time for a kind word to others suffering loss
Still time to sit at a bedside of one losing a battle with this life
Still time to start a prayer chain

And food was love and love was food and food was love
All who came were offered a plate and an unspoken “make yourself at home”
The words were not needed, for when you entered the door, you WERE indeed at home
Extended family….where to begin?
Sons’ friends were “brothers”; In-laws were blood relation; Friends were treated as family
All were welcomed to join in family festivities
There were no outsiders
There were no strangers
There were no uncomfortable moments of silence

EVERYONE was special
EVERYONE was loved
EVERYONE remembers
EVERYONE misses
EVERYONE grieves

And we all long for one more hug
One more conversation…just to hear that voice
That distinctive voice, high-pitched and loud and very clear
Just to hear it say one more time “I love you!” in that lilting, sing-song way

But it is not necessary to hear in order to know
It was true then and it is true now
And that truth is what will sustain through months and years to come

Donna’s Rules:
1. CHILDREN….they are to be our number one priority!
2. ALL CHILDREN in the family are special and should be treated as such.
3. ALL CHILDREN EVERYWHERE are special and should be treated as such.
4. NO CHILD should ever experience hunger, pain or suffering.
5. EVERYONE IS ALLOWED TO BE A CHILD…whenever they want or need to be
Being an adult doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to grow up!
6. Family is family…is family. You stay close no matter what.
7. You must take it upon yourself to help your community and others in need.
8. Love God and have faith in Him to take care of our needs
9. Do the best you can with what you have.
10. Share…share your knowledge with others, share your talents, share your worldly goods
11. And lastly…CHILDREN are our number one priority (just in case you didn’t get
that the first time!)

Being a member of this family is a privilege, an honor, something to be proud of
Feelings of love and comfort surrounded us
Now we are left with warm and fuzzy dreams of what used to be
Those of us left behind feel sorry for ourselves
We CRY for ourselves
We GRIEVE for ourselves
But all is well…

All is well