How many times have we all done something stupid...and as we look back on the incident, we can find a little humor in it!

My ex-wife was not (necessarily) a funny person, but she had a great sense of humor, and that's probably one of her qualities that attracted me to her. I don't like to be around people without a sense of humor. In the 19 years we were together, I never heard a joke or funny story out of her, but then one day she got into the humor business, and told me the following story, and I nearly fell over backwards! I gave her an A+ for this one!

At the time, my wife was a social worker, and worked for the Human Services Department at the state of New Mexico, and the following embarrassing moment happened to her receptionist at work. HUMAN SERVICES

The state Department of Human Services (New Mexico), which handles child abuse cases, was quite busy on this particuliar Monday morning.

Clients and attorney's were waiting in the reception area, and several children were in the nursery, and the telephone was ringing off the hook! The receptionist, had only been on the job for about a week, and as in any new job, she was still trying to find her way around, etc. As the morning wore on, the office scene continued to get quite hectic!

And, by mid-morning, things became a little dizzying for her, as she tried to take care of everyone's needs! About noon time...and looking a little drained and overwhelmed from it all...she was over heard to answer the telephone..."Good morning...Human Cervixes...may I help you?"

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Once my wife got on a roll in the humor business, she was hard to stop! Here is another funny that she told me about her friend Michelle, who did a stupid thing on the way home one night.

STRANDED...
It was about 8:00 in the evening...on a cold December night, and Michelle was on her way home from attending a meeting at school. She was driving on the outskirts of town where she lived, and she noticed and felt something was not right with the front end of her car. She didn't know if a tire was about to blow-out or just what the problem was, etc.

So, she pulled off the highway to take a look. She got out of the car and went around to the passenger side to check things out...and she saw nothing unusual. So, she went back to get into the car and continue on her way home. There was only one problem...SHE LOCKED HERSELF OUT OF THE CAR...OOPS!

She now had a big problem! She left the engine running and the headlights were on as well. What to do? She thought of breaking one of the windows, but her husband would find out about her stupidity...and kill her...or maybe worse!

She paced around the car, trying to figure out what to do! It was cold outside, and she had to think of something fast! She looked down the highway, and noticed there were lights less than a mile, coming from a convenience store or gas station...she hoped! (before cell phones)

The only thing she could do, was to start walking, and call her husband to come and pick her up. She figured it would take her about 15 minutes to walk to the store, so she started walking. A few minutes after she left the scene, a police officer stopped at her car to check things out! What he found was sure interesting.

An abandoned car, with the engine running and the lights still turned on...the doors locked and nobody around! What was the officer to think...foul play, perhaps? The officer looked around the area, to see if he could find anyone...and there was nobody in sight.

So, he called in for other other units to join in on the search! Meanwhile (back at the ranch), back at the convenience store where Michelle had walked to...she arrived and called her husband. As she talked to her husband from the telephone booth from where she was calling...she could see flashing lights, from where she left the car up the hill.

Worry set in for her right away, as she thought something had happened to her car, etc. She told her husband that she would meet him at the car, and she quickly left to get back to the car! Worried...Michelle was in her hurry-up mode to get back to the car, after seeing the flashing lights.

As she walked faster and faster, she noticed there were more and more flashing lights on the scene, and she could now hear dogs barking off in the distance! She didn't know what to think!

She then noticed a low-flying helicopter, with a spotlight shining in every direction! "Who or what could they be looking for?" she thought to herself!

Huffing and puffing...she lumbered down the highway in the soft sand of the shoulder. As she continued down the highway, she knew something was not right where she left the car!

As she got closer and closer...traffic was backed up and there were more flashing lights! What could be going on? After several minutes, she finally reached the scene, and as she hurried across the highway...out of breath...she went up to the first police officer she saw and said,

 "Hello officer...my name is Michelle...and that's my car parked over there! I locked myself out...left the engine running and the headlights on...and I went to get help...IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG?"

  "Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side-effects." Arnold Glascow

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