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Jerry Aragon Ph.D (Phunny humor Doctor)

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Humorous Medical One-Liners
By Jerry Aragon Ph.D (Phunny humor Doctor)   
Rated "G" by the Author.
Last edited: Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Posted: Tuesday, October 25, 2011

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Everyone knows that laughter is the best medicine for whatever ails you...the positive and healing power of humor. Humor benefits us all, as it helps to reduce stress; it helps people cope with the aging process; humor helps to bring people together, and that is important, because teamwork in important in the work place; and last but not least...the punch line...helps the bottom line, etc.

I've been in the humor business for over 50 years, and I never get tired of putting a smile on somebody's face.  Whether it be by telling a joke; carving a piece of wood; or by building my website.  When I build my website, I knew there would be plenty of humor.  But, I wanted something more that that.  I wanted my website to be interesting, too.  To do that, I had to write articles in different topics, which would be important to me, and to my reader as well. 

As of October 1, 2011, I have over 280 articles posted on Authors Den, and the reader can learn more by following the links below;

Website name; humordoctormd; Over 100 colorful pages.  Humor and creativity just seem to go together. 

Authors Den; (writing site/280+ articles)

EzineArticles.com; (article directory/98 articles)

Knock; knock...

Who's there?

The Humor Doctor making a house call...and if you want to get more humor in your life...

Prescription;  Take a large dose of vitamin H (humor)...jest for the health of it. 

Patient to doctor; "I'm dilated to meet you." 

Shin; (definition); a device for finding furniture in the dark; 

Remember...the colder the x-ray table...the longer you'll be on it; 

Doctor to patient;  "My...my...sometimes you're the bug...and sometimes you're the windshield;"

The more you complain...the longer God makes you live;

I get enough exercise, doc, just pushing my luck;

Gynnecologist;  "at your cervix, madam...

Brilliant patient; "I tried sniffing Coke once, and the ice cubes got stuck in my nose." 

If you choke a smurf...what color does it turn?

There are three kinds of people...those who can count...and those who can't...

Love may be blind...but marriage is an eye-opener!

"Hey doc...there's too much blood in my caffeine system."

In medicine...to steal ideas from one person is plagarism.  To steal many ideas is called research. 

We are all born naked; wet; and hungry...and then it gets worse!

What happens if you get scared half-to- death...twice?

Where there's a will...I want to be on it...

Some people are afraid of the dark...and our scientists are trying to find out the speed of dark...

Why do psychics have to ask for your name?

Why isn't phoneic spelled the way it sounds?

In one study, women who want to be equal to men...lack ambition! 

You're just jealous, because the voices are talking to me and not to you...

A closed mouth...gathers no foot!

A bartender is just a pharmacist with limited inventories;

A day without sunshine...is well...night! 

Did you know, that Atheism is a non-prophet organization? 

Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder. 

Did you know...that doctor's bills travel through the mails...at twice the speed of bad checks? 

Our patients are taught to borrow money from a pessimist, because they never expect to get it back.

At medical office; (computer work);  C program run; C program quit; C programmer quit; 

Our young interns are taught that 'change' is inevitable...except in a vending machine! 

CHOCOLATE:  The other major food group;

Conciousness; that annoying time between naps;

Most people in the medical field, believe that death is hereditary. 

Death could be dangerous to your health. 

Psychology Dept.  Everyone has a photographic memory...but not everyone has film. 

Few women admit their age;  as few men act theirs.

in medical newsletter;  FOR SALE;  Parachute like new; only used once; never opened; small stain; 

From our sociology department; Friends come and go...but, enemies tend to accumulate. 

Medical school;  You can't be learning much, when your mouth is moving...

Good healthcare;  Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day;  but teach a man to fish, and he will be in a boat all day drinking beer...

With that...the reader is probably up to your ears in medical...

SITE MAP For Hopelessly Lost Souls;
Copyright; 2011; Jerry Aragon; The Humor Doctor;
Website name;
humordoctormd

 

 

Web Site: humordoctormd



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