“Who’s really running this DPS cruise?”

Peter Paton

“Where are the pirates?”

Karen Vidra

“And I bet many of you guessed

That these Comic Book Intros

Would Somehow End With Cookies.”

Dead Ed

It’s Time to Start Working

On All Our New Comic Books

And We Here at DPS Comics

Thank Everyone for Taking a Look

Ruff ‘N Ready Rufuz – Our Pet Detective

Will Continue Reviewing Your Requests

For next year’s 2007 Comic Book Season

He Would Really Love to Present the Best

But First…

In This Last Installment of the 2006 Season

We Present the Captain of our Ghost Cruise

So Climb Aboard Those Now Sailing With Us

It’s Now Time For Us to Party – Not to Snooze

-Intro-

“What kind of bloody country is this?

We have plenty of crumpets,

But not one bloody cookie to be found.”

Captain Andrew Blackbeard, 1713

They say he was a normal enough lad

A young cabin boy on a seafaring ship

But a fateful trip to a North American port

Would send him on a devilish centuries long trip

He found a tin of delicious cookies on a port of call

In a quaint little North Carolina town’s sweet tooth shop

And on the voyage back to England Andrew became addicted

Now his life-long penchant for ever more cookies would not stop

He searched all over England night and day

But not one bloody little cookie could he find

So Andrew soon became a very desperate pirate

A black hearted cookie thief – truly one of a kind

“Give us all yer cookies now, Lads, or we’ll surely run you in,

Heaven can be found in just one little bite from yer wee little tin.”

“Chocolate Chip, Pecan, Gingerbread, Rum, Spice, and Raisin, Too,

I’d make a pact with the devil hisself, fer just one more delectable chew.”

“And I Vow I Will Not Rest until The Day I Can Find the Perfect Wife,

To Bake Me Cookies Every Mornin, Fer the Rest of Me Bloody Life!”

So began Andrew Blackbeard’s terrible reign of cookie terror

Up and down America’s coastline and through the Caribbean

He pillaged shops and ships and even pestered tiny children

“Psst!  Hey, Kiddy, Ye Best Hand Over that Cookie I am Seein!”

They say Captain Andrew Blackbeard’s ship The Black Cookie

Mysteriously disappeared one day nearly three hundred years ago

He had heard about a very appetizing island somewhere out there

“Set Sail Swiftly Now, Lads, it’s off to the Bermuda Triangle we go!”

It’s believed Captain Blackbeard never found his cookie heaven

His ship and all its crew still sails the eerie Bermuda Triangle seas

But some claim that old Blackbeard did make that pact with the Devil

And he still waits for the perfect mate who will bake him endless cookies

Andrew Blackbeard was one of the most notorious pirates in the history of seafaring. With a long scraggly beard that hung very low upon his chest, he would strike terror into the hearts of his victims very quickly by weaving wicks laced with gunpowder into his beard, and lighting them on fire while devilishly dancing all around them devouring dozens of cookies.

If they resisted, he would often maroon the crews and burn their ships, and, of course, take every last cookie he could find. Andrew Blackbeard worked very hard at establishing his devilish image, and his extremely lawless cookie pirating career lasted many years before he, his crew, and his old ship, The Black Cookie, sailed off into the eerie depths of the Bermuda Triangle, where some say this pirate ghost ship can still be found today.

Thought to have been a native of England, Andrew Blackbeard was using the name Andy Turner when he began his cookie pirating career about 1713 as a young cabin boy aboard a Jamaican sloop commanded by the infamous pirate Benjamin ‘The Very Crooked’ Hook.

©2006, DPS Comics

Pirate Andrew Blackbeard

And His Ghastly Ghostly Crew

Will Be Our Fabulous Hosts

On the DPS Summer Ghost Cruise

He’ll Be Floating around The Ship

All Week Long

Signing Collector’s Copies

Of His Exciting New Comic Book

Pirates of the Bermuda Triangle

And Rumor Has It

That Captain Blackbeard

Is Really Looking Forward

To Meeting Princess Anita

And Her Entire Moldy Cookie Family

Could Our Host

Actually Be

Princess Anita’s

Long Awaited

Prince Charming?

You’ll Just Have to Sail With Us

To Find Out

“Shove Off Now, Me Laddies,

And Head Straight for the Triangle,

We’re Gonna Party All Eternity Long!

All Eternity Long!

All Eternity Long!

And Princess Anita,

May Yer Captain

Have the Privilege

Of the Very First Dance?!

Yo, Ho, Ho!

This is Gonna Be,

One Hell of a Cruise!”