I tossed and turned
For most of the night
Because my thoughts
Were full of you
Too far away;
I try not to think
Of the dangers you face
And keep my worry
Hidden
Behind a mask
Of serenity
And optimism;
But, my darling,
When I am alone
In our bed
And the night
Closes in,
Your image dances
Like a home movie
Before my eyes,
And I see you again
On the day we met,
When your shopping cart
"Ran away" from you
And crashed into mine;
I see you that day
On the beach
When you nervously stole
Our first kiss,
And I feel once more
The wonder
Of our wedding night
When, exhausted,
We fell asleep
In one another's arms
Then made love
In the pink dawn
Of the new day.
I knew then
That duty
Would someday call,
And you would be sent
Into harm's way,
I thought
I could stand it,
That I was strong enough
To be a Marine's wife;
But the truth is
Worry is eating me alive
Even as my body
Adjusts
To the growing presence
Of the little one I carry.
I smiled through my tears
As you walked away
With your unit,
Biting my tongue
To keep from demanding
That you not be the hero,
All the while
Silently begging God,
As I do now,
Not to take you,
But to bring you safely home
To me.