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Blogs by Ayn Hunt
Who's in Charge Here? 8/25/2004 5:26:17 AM
Do we have control over or own life, or is something more powerful, written in some nebulous language we can't understand, guiding us, bending us to their will? (heavy stuff LOL) My third book, The Haunting, was published in July -- YAY. Then, about the same time, my computer got infected with a virus and ate my entire manuscript for my 4th book -- BOO. No, I didn't have it saved, although I thought it did. I had it saved on several discs ... but the virus destroyed the hard drive and the disc drive, ruining all the discs I tried.
Okey dokey, back to Square One. I was devasted, sure I was! Who wouldn't be? But I decided I could either moan and groan (which I did), and either sit here, fuming, or get to work. I chose the latte path. I got a new computer, and decided I'd try something a little bit different ... rewrite and polish an old Romance I'd written years ago. It's a small detour, really. I used to be a member of RWA years ago, and my first love was writing that genre. I'm also still friends with some ladies who still belong to that same chapter ... still go to things there every so often ... so what the heck?
In a way, it's like taking a mini-vacation. It's kind of fun, although I think I've inadvertently alienated a few author friends who think I've gone off the deep end.
But the thing is, I haven't given up on Gothics. I'm going back to my fourth manuscript ... but with a different slant on it.
And, in between working on my Romance and writing notes about my Gothic, I've been wondering about who really is in charge here? Us or Fate?
I feel like I'm on a path, but there's a bend up ahead I can't see around. I'm walking forward and the terrain around me is familiar .. but what's around that bend? Is it something I'll like ... or something I have reason to fear?
I've always hated strange places. The unfamiliar scares me, which considering I usually write Gothics, might seem a bit strange. I personally would not have chosen to put that bend in that particular place. But then I wouldn't have chosen to have my computer get sick and go bonkers on me either... not after (finally) completing my dadburned fourth manuscript. So who's in charge here? Obviously, its not me. So that means there's something else who's taken charge. And it follows, if that 'something' is in charge of me, then its the same way for others too. I don't believe in random happenings. Everything in our lives happens for a distinct reason.
I'll probably never know the answer to who really is in charge. But being a writer, I cope, if you will, by writing, and by venting using the written word.
That's it for today. Today's watchword phrase is "The Unknown."
