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My roommate 9/17/2007 4:11:04 PM
If you had to pick a character from a horror film to bunk with, who would you pick? Okay, so the question is "what horror film character would make the best roommate?"
For me, here is a list of the characters: Freddy, Jason, Leatherface, Michael Myers, Chucky, the guy from scream, and the hellraiser/pin guy. I know there's some fisherman/hook guy from "I know what you did...", but I'm really not familiar and quite honestly, it sounds like it sucks. Also, the "ball" from Phantasm doesn't count, you can't have a ball be a roommate, that would be just plain stupid.
NOT EVEN CLOSE:
Hellraiser - Not very familiar, but I know what he looks like. This would end the first time we pass in the hall and I get scratched/stuck by one of his pins. This wouldn't last more than two hours.
Scream Guy - Again, not the most familiar with this character, but from what I know I could never have a kitchen with knives. And there my friends, is no way to live.
THOUGHT ABOUT IT, BUT NO THANKS:
Leatherface - Definitely seems like a guy who seems to know his way around a kitchen, but maybe a little too messy, not too mention the cannibalism. Plus, he seems to be the type of guy to have a lot of shady friends just "dropping by".
Freddy - Great sense of humor, only the sweater goes into the laundry, and would be great to have around for opening mail and boxes. Might be annoyed with his constant turning up the thermostat, oh, and of course that never having a good night's sleep again problem.
Chucky - A mini clown? No thanks. I guess I didn't really think about that one.
THE FINALS:
Michael Myers - Seems like the ideal roommate, loyal and is probably a Steelers fan. However, I believe the "Halloween" music follows him around, and that would drive me nuts.
Jason - My pick for a roommate. Keeps to himself, doesn't say a lot. Pretty safe as well, provided you don't go camping (NOTE: I don't acknowledge any of the "Jason takes " movies). Another positive is when he leaves his hockey mask lying around you can play gags with your friends.
David S. Grant is the author of Corporate Porn, an alcohol and sandwich fueled romp through the darker side of corporate America and the lighter side of the adult film industry. Corporate Porn can be purchased at http://www.silverthought.com/davidgrant/ Check out his website: http://www.davidsgrant.com
Praise for David S. Grant’s work:
"David S. Grant’s Corporate Porn represents a bright new entrant to the unnamed genre of fiction from writers like Bret Easton Ellis and Chuck Palahniuk. This genre could be thought of differentially as black humor, satire, deadpan character study, and a dash of existentialism. Though no one has yet to put a name on it, Grant is throwing his lot in with the vibe of some of the very best 21st century American fiction....There is not a great way to describe how generational this book feels, but it does. I would be interested in getting the reaction from an older audience to this book, because so much of it feels like a Gen X inside joke. I think it is a little unbecoming to gush too much over a work like this, since that’s obviously the very thing that the author despises, so I’ll keep my qualitative comments to this: I couldn’t put it down."
"Mr. Grant's page-turner takes us into a world we may never go nor want to. We become engulfed and intrigued, maybe even voyeurs, through his characters lives. His characters could be any one of us.
Definitely writer and movie savvy."
"Wow, talk about imagery. Geez, that razor blade in the mouth and the way you described it...I liked it."
"Fresh and Daring...well penned"
"Opening the cover of this book starts an adventure and from page to page you're not sure what is to be expected. The dialogue is witty and humorous. The story moves at a rapid pace with constant action keeping you on your feet. Corporate Porn is an enjoyable, quick read."
"Great lead-in. After one sentence I want to know more..." “David S. Grant’s work is like reading an aggressive screenplay in paragraph form. The story and dialogue are tight and the sarcasm drips with humor.”
"Excellent! You had me from the first work...more, more, more."
"I laughed my ass off...I've been there so many times (minus the ecstasy)!"
"Strong and well written work...I can definitely relate to the characters...Excellent!."
"Wow! I really thought he would take it over the bridge! What an enthralling story!"
