It’s funny how often we find ourselves
'back at Start’. The good intentions,
the happy-handed foresight, the ‘pot of gold
at the end of the rainbow’ scenario, all fall
with generous slack.

Life, in its dynamism, in its chaos, in its
changing nature, continually hacks away
at ‘growth’ thoughts. The slices and slivers
of pieces of self are dragged by chains
of awareness, weighing our mind-heels.

At first, we feel their incessant tugs, and
hear their pleas of birth, with petty confidence.
We diaper them with disposable arrogance,
sure of success of conquest, sure of liberty.
We pretend to 'see’, with renewed eyes of self-love.

But, damn! Technological and spiritual world
Chaos constantly convolutes – everything! Every
day brings us closer to becoming ‘Nothings’!
Like Cro-Magnon nothings, like Holocaust
nothings, like nothings, nothing, Nothing.

There is no blame to Progress, it’s the use
of Progress, converted by perversion, and the
greed to be powerful, and intolerant, which
warps our spirits, shelves our minds, slays our
souls, and shrinks our hearts, and wills.

It seems insurmountable to be able to be
a brother, a family member, to the over
six billion people now on this Earth. I mean,
really. Circumstances, aided by chaos, dictated
by illusion, have created such bias, we die casually.

Then, there are the interactions, and reactions,
of those over six billion people on this planet,
becoming such a knot of everything, to think of it,
to live it, is like ‘Hell on Earth’, it IS Hell on Earth.
It’s the combination of ‘all of this’ that kills ‘intentions’.

And, therein lays the problem, and the solution.
Our greatest conquest, our greatest battle of all,
our race’s mission is to create ‘Heaven on Earth’. If
we can create hell, we can create heaven. The difficulty
factor has gone up, but, so has our learning and understanding.

To get back to the subject of good intentions, I feel leaden
and blue, as many do, when failing. I am nothing, a statistic,
a grocery store guinea pig, a casualty of intent not always
of my making, working on changing, on bleeding out
an approximation of Lividity, and, breathing in Life.

Erin Elizabeth Kelly-Moen
© Copyright 10/20/05