Ireland is a beautiful country, the land of Oscar Wilde and James Joyce,
two exiles from the four green fields. The narrator of the poem could be Brian O'Nolan
or a free-thinking tee-totaller, who knows!







______________________________________

THE WEDDING GUEST


The first lesbian marriage in Falcarragh has received a mixed reception
And been closely followed by the heterosexual community.
The whiskey-drinking, cap-wearing fraternity
have mostly given their blessing. Old Jock McPherson, alas,
maintains a strong aversion to the whole idea
and intends to write to The Donegal Democrat, outlining
his fears for the local children of Falcarragh
now that they have two gays in their midst.
What exactly the priest meant by co-joining
two women in the hand of marriage has been completely
lost on him.

Jock is quite entitled to sing from a different hymn-sheet
to the majority, but he should, I feel, be diplomatic
and not sully the Big Day for the girls.
Bernadette and Rachel hope Jock will come round eventually,
meanwhile, they have asked God to send him a new love.

Falcarragh’s heterosexual community includes
many young men who can be found in the Shamrock Bar,
watching the Gaelic football of a Sunday morning.
In my guise as the village idiot, I wandered in
after the service, and asked a few of these strapping lads
(Stout members of the drinking brotherhood),
Their opinion about this momentous occasion:
Barrel-chested, Seamus O’Donnell, said in his quiet way,
‘Different strokes for different folks!’
He’s not scared of being different that boy!
Dan Cannon wrapped an arm around my shoulder and said,
‘Now that we have a bit of money in our pockets,
Ireland has become more liberal. We’ve always
Been proud of our political rebels, now it seems
Our gender rebels are being respected, too!’
He’s got a lot to say for himself has Dan!

I could be wrong, but I left the Shamrock
With the feeling that we are indeed living
In different times; the times they are a-changin'
sang Bob Dylan in the Sixties.

That same day, I was buying a packet of Polo mints in Londis
When I recognized Orla Quinn in the queue.
She said hello and wasn’t it a lovely wedding.
She told me Rachel and Bernadette intend to set up home
In an artist’s colony near the Millhouse.
They do not regard themselves as New Age flakes,
But Pioneers in the best sense of the word.

In conclusion, all I can say, as one who has thought
Long and hard about coming out as a bicycle,
It is my firm resolve, my New Year resolution,
You might say, to stay in the shed and read
Flann O’Brien novels for the rest of my life –
Even if I have to write them myself!