I know, I know, it's Christmas and the poetry should aim at the cake with 2008 candles (Fire Marshall not amused)
Well, here they are, together again, and the CHALLENGE is to tell about that party, that if all of you aren't so chicken to cross literary swords with La Belle Red and Ole Dog Captain Ed.

La Belle Rouge & Ole Dog Captain Ed (Part Five & Finale)


by Edvard the Elder


Captain La Belle Red’s brass telescopic magnifier
Showed of a schooner anchored its lanterns alight
very poorly armed with pitiful nine small cannons
apparently to defend the weak maple wood sides,
and flying on top a Nova Scotia wimpy streamer
it will be a shame to waste good powder in that one.

She could say like the limey “Captain Fee I presume”
your boat need from my crew a thoroughly wipe
to take away all the perfumed talc from you peruke
a put in shape your sissy crew of canucks on white,
as on the deck she could see a few more drunken men
like Ted, John, Dan, Jasmin, Emile and Salty Walty.

But, wait a moment! Ole Dog Captain Ed’s magnifier
was innocently pointing to another ship’s backside
full of lovely women scantily dressed to the weather
that if La Belle caught him looking will trash his hide,
from other trips he recognized some of lovely them,
Rebecca, Karen, Linda, Doc Bonnie and Lily the Tiger.

“I can see Andre there, he’s writing new laws on a scroll,”
La Belle said, Ole Dog answered, “bosoms caught me eyes
of Kathy, Rose, Amber, Jill, Southern Comfort and Victoria…”
“cool off! Ole Dog don’t you ever forget you are mine!
and to make you day I will say to what I am looking now,
at your brother PeeWee and that stinking Jersey Ed’ asinine”.

“What you think they are here for?” said La Belle ready
and spoiling suddenly for past insults to start a mighty fight,
“We can anchor here and turn the ship’s Starboard to them
and show our two rows of twenty eight cannons on our side”
“Don’t you get any ideas of fraternizing with the maidens”
“And you my dear Belle, keep your knickers well on and tied”

As the ship turned half way around to take a good view
with its already open twenty eight loaded pair of eyes,
there comes an “hooray!!!” from the other anchored ships
from Jude, Regis, D’Artagnan, Abdi Noor and two Larry’s
with a chorus with Marcia, Carol, Chrisa and Morning Star
a jubilation to warm the heart of any pirate and a fighter.

“I have no heart to blast those scoundrels” said Ole Dog,
“look, there’s Susan, Liana and the twins Karla and Karen”
“And I can see, said La Belle, “Richard, George C and Art”
“Nothing to compare Christine, Anessa, Lady J and Chantilly,
wow! them poor girls need badly some clothes on their skin!”
“Ole Dog! Stop looking or I swear all of them I will blast!”

And then, like magic, they were all over the Temptress,
merrily enjoying each other company like good ol’times,
forgotten were those cruel words and cruelest battles,
deciding to get together once more since Fee’s bacchanal,
but this time at the helm will be Rufuz as the First Mate,
as La Belle Red and Ole Dog announced, it was bedtimes!