just some boys having fun (including
two special friends i've incorporated
into this poem--enjoy!)
look deres roberto again lets gittim soun like fun remember da las snowball fight we killed im yeah yeah oh yeah we gottim good well lets gittim again yas got ya ammo yeah plenny how bout yas yeah johnny shoot lookit johnnys pile--hes got enuff t start a friggin war oh yeah i gots more den enuff nobody gonna mess wit johnny oh yeah its war shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh here he comes hide or sometin git outta here shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh do yas have t be so noisy shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hes gonna heah yas RUFUZ gitoverheah good boy q u i e t yeah dats da way *giggle* dammit johnny hes gonna heah ya ya crazy or sometin awwwwwwwwww eddie said a bad woid yeah his moms is gonna wear him out never mind shhhhhhhhhhhh hes gittin closer *whistling* closer almost heah almooooost W H A P ya gottim good shootin awww GEEZ right inna FACE awright is dat eddie chad an johnny could be mebbe not MWA HA HAAAAA W H A P awwwwwwwwwwww man my SHOIT my bran new one too whap whap whap yer turn sucka W H I F F dammit i missed eddie ya said it again i didn't W H A P W H A P ohhhhhhhh man now ya gonna die sucka W H A P W H A P W H A P W H A P W H A P W H A P awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww man RUFUZ quit lickin me inna face quit git outta da way rufuz good boy gittim holdim i'm gonna stuff it down his drawers down da front NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not da DRAWERS dammit he got me inna eye again just like las time HOLDIM dats gonna leave a mark DAMMIT eddie shaddup chad ive hoid ya say woiser DON'T STUFF IT DOWN MY PAAAANTS AWWWWWWWWW GEEEEZ DATS MEAN yall are coldblooded yas know dat quit stop it QUIT DANG IT YALL QUIT NOW I AINT KIDDIN STOOOOOOP i said yall QUIT whaddaya say i ax moms for a hot cocoa oh yeah soun real good yeah sides i gotta pee cmon HEY MOMS YA GOTS ANY HOT COCOA WE GOTTA USE DA BAFROOM cmon in guys WIPE YER DANG FEETS moms will kill yas if yas sling snow all over me foist i gotta pee real bad not as bad as me ooooops i just went AWWWWWWW MAN YA DIDN'T MOMS IS GONNA KI i was just teasin ya go foist i'm gonna kill ya YEAH MOMS naw i aint gonna kill nobody just da guys teasin RUFUZ dont shake inna HOUSE awwwww man now i gotta mess t clean up sorry guys moms will hava fit if i don clean dis up help me out a little wouldya okay done bad boy rufuz ya knows betta den to shake inna house awww awright ill give ya some lovin cmere boy i can smell dat hot chocolate now mmmmmmmm smells goooood yeah man yeah yeah sorry rufuz ya caint have none chocolates a no no ill git yas sometin inna minnit awwwww stop lookin at me like dat awright heah dere ya go deres some treats fer yas sit down boys lemme git yas some hot cocoa mmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmm mmmmm tanks mrs kronowitz mmmmmmmm sure taste good yer welcome you sure are polite your mama learned ya good not like MOMS not in front of da guys PLEASE hey mrs kronowitz eddie said dammit twiced i hoid it tree times mebbe fo EDDIE did ya yeah moms what have i told ya bout cussin dont dont what dont say bad woids dont say bad words what dont say bad woids moms where ya learnin dat from ya aint learnin it from me awwwwwwww da guys at school ya need t stop hangin round dose guys dey aint nuttin but trouble yeah moms im sorry i said dam eDDIE dat one slip im sorry i said dem bad woids aint gonna happin no mo okay son how was yer snowball fight awwwwwww man mrs kronowitz eddie like to have killed me i didnt even knowed eddie and chad and johnny was dere all of a sudden dey gots me woiser den las time dats da way wars is fought don let da enemy knows yas onto im now son how ya knows so much bout wars oh cause i watches da t.v. yas learn a lotta stuff from da t.v. yeah an ya watches too much why dont ya learn how to read more awwwwwwwwww MOMS PLEEEEEASE
(C) karla dorman, 2003
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Reviews of "kids playin in da snow in da bronx (part two)"
Reviewed by Robert Blackwell (Reader)
Reviewed on December 7, 2003
Excellent! Very unique writing here. {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}
Reviewed by ***** ********* (Reader)
Reviewed on December 5, 2003
So, uh, Kahla, wuss dis s'pozzed ta be about, huhn? Whutcha sayin' here, huhn? Da snowball fight wuz a beaut', ya know, but, uh, I'm kinda missin' da, crap whutz da woid, Oh yeh, da "metafour". I mean, itz po-tree, right, but it don't rime, but still a pome? S'pozzed ta maybe have a hiddin' meanin', right? So whuss up wit dis?
Hey we had snow flurries here today, and I am looking forward to a real snowball war again. my friends and I did this in Sea Isle, we would build two forts on either end of the center island of the street and bombard each others armies. We even used to bomb the cops car when it came past, he used to get out and start to throw snowballs back at us, till he gave up and ran away...Loved this Karla, brought back some excellent memories...thanks, Ed & Rufuz
(Rufuz wants his cut of this poem too, LOL!)
Reviewed by Floria Kelderhouse (Reader)
Reviewed on December 2, 2003
Heh heh heh...snow....I love it...the kids love it....this is really great reading...very entertaining Karla...floria
Karla nobody can do this like you! I decare you the champ in this genre!;-)You always make me laugh and hold my interest throughout start to finish! Wonderful imagery!I could never do this vernacular!Kudo's!
This took me right into the middle of the action; it felt like I was in the snowball fight; could hear those boys yellin' as they were throwing snow at each other! (And I LOVE how you incorporated Ed Matlack and RUFUZ into this write; they are gonna' FREAK!!!) Wonderful poem full of imagery, action, and overall wintertime FUN! (Makes ME miss Ohio and all the SNOW!! And Katydid, you do that...send us Texas folk some SNOW; we'd LOVE IT!!) Enjoyed much; this is going into my library! (((HUGS))) and much love, your twin, Karen Lynn. :D Love you, Karla!
Reviewed by Kate Clifford (Reader)
Reviewed on December 2, 2003
Thanks for some fun! Hmmm I'll have to see if I can round up some snow........:-)
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<I liked the poem, very imaginative, Karla!>
God Bless
~Michelle~
(Rufuz wants his cut of this poem too, LOL!)
TRASK
This took me right into the middle of the action; it felt like I was in the snowball fight; could hear those boys yellin' as they were throwing snow at each other! (And I LOVE how you incorporated Ed Matlack and RUFUZ into this write; they are gonna' FREAK!!!) Wonderful poem full of imagery, action, and overall wintertime FUN! (Makes ME miss Ohio and all the SNOW!! And Katydid, you do that...send us Texas folk some SNOW; we'd LOVE IT!!) Enjoyed much; this is going into my library! (((HUGS))) and much love, your twin, Karen Lynn. :D Love you, Karla!