The sun sets between my thighs

Sighing in my right ear

Leaving a whisper.

Cinnamon candlelight.

Curving bodies flash into darkness

Seeking the peace of my womb

Like the beauty of an opening surah.

He is molten gold.

I am the philosopher’s stone

Transmuting sorrow with sensual touch.

Reverent fingertips and worshipping lips:

I love you.

Pale words for passion

Whitewashed in the morning.

Reality is we are not celestial lovers

As he rises, washes away our sins and returns

To his flesh.

Our couplings are convenient.

We love each other with access of ease

Knowing neither of us is a reality.

His daily life is separate from mine.

We connect through casual calls

& distant texts.

Pretentious paramours losing interest

Once sighs have evaporated with incense dust.

Our lust is a complex thing

Or at least we pretend it is.

Season our indiscretions

With intellectual leanings to keep it

Interesting—for the moment.

Our love is dormant…until

He blows into town with mischief

& the last memory of bodily bliss

Fresh in his mind.

Stale in the way it unwinds.

Wasted wine unfit to be drunk

Yet we sip as if spring

Still sparkles in its depths.

This is a desperate cry to be saved

From ourselves.

From the emptiness of loving others

That will not return our affections.

We are creatures of vile habits

Refined to a saccharine art.

Sacrilegious to allow this man in my temple.

Beautiful liar.

Smiles as perfect and shattering

As the lies we weave so tightly

Within our tongues as we trade

An elixir of kisses

Meant to keep us blitzed

Against our own agonies.

This arrogance is not bliss.

It is penance we commit

to punish ourselves.

We are the most loving sadomasochists.

I often wish us far apart

That I might forget that for a moment

I believed we could actually heal one another.

Be in love with one another.

Only to push back the satin covers

Exposing our atrocities all over again.

I kiss you good morning

Lightly with a lie on my lips:

I love you.

His untruth is just as sincere

As the sun departs my doorway

Leaving ashes in my mouth.