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Lloyd Lofthouse

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Member Since: Apr, 2008

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The Dying Mother
by Lloyd Lofthouse → (All Poetry by Lloyd Lofthouse)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
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It was a long goodbye.

It took a long time
For mother to die.

Everyone believed
She would go first,
With dad,
The last dirty-old-man,
Playing the field
Since he loved women.

Mother wore out the pages in her
Medical encyclopedia
To speed things up
On the highway
Of exotic diseases.

Before turning forty,
She had a hysterectomy
When cancer cells multiplied.

That didn’t help
Her state of mind.

Soon after that first surgery,
She left the Catholic Church
Becoming a Jehovah Witness
Getting ready to join God
Since death was eminent,
A heartbeat away.

After forty, a malignant tumor
The size of a grapefruit
Recruited an army in one her kidneys;
Like the Battle of the Bulge
During WWII,
That nasty Nazi,
A Hitler in disguise,
Was surrounded
And cut off from the rest of her body.
A rare encapsulated,
Parasitical alien life form without a visa
That the City of Hope’s doctors
Exorcised.

After Lola’s fiftieth, she asked
Her three children
What we wanted
From the house
Since death was close and
Father would outlive her to marry again.
I said, “I don’t want to talk about death.
Let’s take one day at a time
And enjoy what remains.”

My older sister and brother
Made out lists
Carting valuables home
Like picking flesh from
The carcass
While two hearts
Were still beating.

My dad died at seventy-nine
With a sour expression on his face
As he gasped his last.
The doctor told him,
“You quit smoking ten years too late.”
He was younger than her.

My brother took
Dad’s tools and the beloved Cadillac
Leaving it wrecked
Beside a road.

She cried a river of tears
After fifty-four years of marriage.
She missed dad.
I missed him too.
He was the quiet one
That listened.

Loneliness settled
Around mother like
A hot summer day
When it hurts to breathe
The scorched air
As one friend
After another
Left this earth
While she lived in that house
Alone in the desert
With her Bible
And five acres
Surrounded by a chain link fence
And sage brush
Two hundred miles from
My condo and job.

She told me once,
“In the mornings
Before I get out of bed
In this silent,
Empty house,
I forget how old I am.
I think I’m fourteen again,
But the mirror
Does not lie
And God
Is always nearby.”

At eighty-nine, cancer
Arrived one last time.
There was surgery
Removing the bleeding
Tumor in her intestines.
Mother lingered for
Two painful weeks
Screaming in agony,
Praying for an end to her story.

The call came during my
Fifth period English class
With students reading
The dramatic, tragic death scene
From Romeo and Juliet.

That day spelled an end
To more than one love story.
Sometimes death is a blessing.

I never told my students.
Let them find out
For themselves.
It’s better that way.
_______________________________________

Discover the historical fiction novel, My Splendid Concubine, by Lloyd Lofthouse, (click here) at this AuthorsDen page.

 Click here for Concubine Trailer

 
 
"My Splendid Concubine is packed cover to cover with intriguing characters and plot, a must read for historical fiction fans and a fine addition to any collection on the genre." Midwest Book Review, May 8, 2008

 


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 Reviews of "The Dying Mother"
Reviewed by Henry Stevens
Reviewed on October 29, 2008
I find it very interesting the way you've woven the important story into your poem. Thanks for sharing. s/henry

Reviewed by Regis Auffray
Reviewed on September 12, 2008
Outstandingly compelling poetic account, Lloyd. The reader cannot help but be deeply moved. Thank you. Love and peace to you,

Regis

Reviewed by Gene Williamson
Reviewed on September 5, 2008
Lloyd, a difficult write beautifully told. -gene.

Reviewed by John Flanagan
Reviewed on September 1, 2008
Clarity and directness are the outstanding features here and it is indeed a novel in essence, a powerful, honest telling.
John

Reviewed on September 1, 2008
It was indeed a long and difficult goodbye. A very unique and compelling write. I'm so sorry for your loss Lloyd.

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on September 1, 2008
I've known only one other woman so resilient to cancer. She is still alive after both uterine and breast cancer. Glad you were able to share it with us. My mother is 82, with controlled diabetes and high blood pressure. My father parallels yours, except it took longer for his twenty years of smoking to get him, He was 85.

Ron

Reviewed on August 31, 2008
My tears join yours in these lines - you tell a powerful tale in perfectly selected words, not one wasted - well done -

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

Reviewed by David Hightower
Reviewed on August 31, 2008
Lloyd - Your The Dying Mother is like a novel compacted into so few words. The story of lives, not just one life. As experience grows with time we realize (though we may be reluctant to say it) that "Sometimes death is a blessing." Words cannot tell us this only experience can, thus the truth of your last stanza:

I never told my students.
Let them find out
For themselves.
It’s better that way.

Profound and touching poem filled with love and compassion but without a touch of sentimentality. That is its strength. - David

Reviewed by Dawn Anderson
Reviewed on August 31, 2008
The story to this is so wonderfully told. Yes, there is such sadness within your lines, but you have told it clearly and with such beauty. My favorite stanza is the thirteenth. The imagery in that stanza is incredible.

Reviewed on August 30, 2008
Heartbreaking account, felt the sting of death too powerfully as I read these lines; lost daddy three months ago on May 28, 2008; still grieving, still miss him so much! Very well written; bravo!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :( >tears! <

Reviewed by Sandie May Joyce
Reviewed on August 30, 2008
You have a good account of your parents lives. You are right about death, sometimes it is a blessing to end the misery of the disease and the pain. I'm sorry your mother had to endure such pain before she passed away, but she is now pain free and living like she's 14 once again. You should be happy at that.

My own parents both died of cancer a couple of years ago, and whenever I dreamed about them, they were always very young in my dreams, and I, too, was very young, like I was a little girl once again in the dreams.

A wonderful account of your parents' lives, and is well-told. Thank you for sharing!

Sandie Angel :o)

Reviewed by Linda Law
Reviewed on August 30, 2008
your writing brings everything to life; even in death... Losing our loved ones is something we cannot prepare for...even when we know...why one goes before another is never clear...I wonder that about myself alot...why am I still here...so many losses.. a baby, both parents, grandmother whom I adored, precious husband, another son right after that, and more have left this world since... yet, I remain? I know we all have many memories, bad and good, and you do a wonderful service to your story. Your gift is intense. lindalaw

Reviewed by Linda Hill
Reviewed on August 30, 2008
Lloyd,
I read this with tears in my eyes. When your parents pass away nothing is ever quite the same again. My Mama died at 39 getting hit by a car as she left work at midnight. She was crossing the road. My Dad died a few years later of CHF. I understand how you feel, Lloyd. It hurts. Time won't erase her memory, but it will ease the pain of losing her. She'll always live in your heart. Heartfelt write, Lloyd. You are in my prayers.

Blessings,
~Linda

Reviewed by Valerie Roeske
Reviewed on August 30, 2008
Wow, Mom thought she was going for years, you write so delicately about her death and your dads, you were blessed with them, and so sweetly put into words, Take care Valerie

Reviewed by Lois Christensen
Reviewed on August 30, 2008
yOU WENT THROUGH A LOT. i KNOW MY tOM DIED FROM TOO MANY CIGARETTES TOO LATE TOO. mY MOM DIED OF A BRAIN TUMOR, BUT WENT EASILY TOO. sHE ONLY SUFFERED 3 YEARS IN BED AT A NURSING HOME. i DID NOT GET TO SEE HER OFTEN, BUT THE NIGHT BEFORE SHE DIED i HELD HER HAND. I can take death easily now, not afraid as I watched Tom go so peaceably.


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