The Introspective Musings of THP

I don’t understand how I arrived at this place.

I don’t understand why fate brought me here.

Hell – I don’t understand if fate was responsible –

Or if I consciously decided to surrender free will to free fall.

I don’t understand you.

I don’t understand me with you.

I definitely don’t understand the wet cat response -

I thought the wet cat was dead.

I don’t understand your continued reluctance.

I don’t understand your occasional drunken pursuit.

I don’t understand why some days I am sought –

And the following days ignored.

I don’t understand your need for unencumbered real estate.

I don’t understand moments later an intimate touch.

I don’t understand if these are just your terms/your way –

Or if you are conflicted and warring within your own mind.

I don’t understand my preoccupation with you.

I don’t understand the omissions versus the truths.

I don’t understand my need for your complete honesty –

Considering the lie I myself am living.

I don’t understand why I attempt to reach you.

I don’t understand why you push me away.

I don’t understand why the experience of 30 seconds of “didn’t suck” –

Has had such a profound affect on my life.

I don’t understand that I can’t have what I want, right now.

I don’t understand how you cannot want, some if not all.

I don’t understand where to go from here –

And whether it will be with or without you.