A Man Named Finnister and More Stories

A Man Named Finnister

There was a man named Finnister,

Who was the town’s sole minister;

His outlook was dour,

His demeanor sour,

His sermons always sinister.

In the Sistine Chapel

When I was in the chapel named Sistine,

I met a woman named Christine;

As the person in charge,

Her duty was large,

Still Christine kept everything pristine.

A Fellow Who Wanted to Think

A fellow who had been drinking,

Decided to do some thinking;

But his thoughts were scrambled,

 His perceptions rambled,

He thought that his brain was shrinking.

A Fellow Named Jimbo

There was a fellow named Jimbo,

Who married a pretty bimbo;

She was very sweet,

From her head to her feet,

But she soon left Jimbo in limbo.

A Fellow Named Brimshaw

There once was a fellow named Brimshaw,

Who decided to buy a rickshaw;

He thought he was wise,

In his first enterprise,

Hauling folks through the streets of Grimshaw.

A Lady Named Donna

There’s a lady I know named Donna,

Who looks a lot like Madonna;

She has a good voice,

And it is her choice,

To sing with me in my sauna.

A Fellow Who Wanted to Marry

There was a fellow named Larry,

Who really wanted to marry;

But try as he might,

Not a girl would bite,

Neither Kerry, Sherry, nor Mary.

Old MacDonald

Old MacDonald had a farm,

And on his farm, he did no harm;

He raised pigs and cattle,

And snakes that could rattle,

In winter he kept his wife warm.

New York City Lady

There’s a gal in New York City,

Who enjoys writing a ditty;

She’s a classy lady,

Not in the least shady,

Moreover, she’s also quite witty.

A Lass Named Raven

There is a lass named Raven,

Who seeks some kind of haven;

She’s met me somehow,

As so it is now,

On her heart true love is graven.

© Regis Auffray