maybe I’m not doing much
a scholar with a crooked smile
a girl with braids and a heavy schoolbag
a woman whose nails rarely click on the dark keyboard
maybe I’m not doing much
but I’m holding the love I was given
in dark red seconds of eternal dreams
in songs and words and chipped teacups
antidote against narrow scope
conversation given for free
underestimated chimney fire
one may run away from the glow
the fear that is so often ignored
so much stronger than the love
tightrope-walker, rich with heartbeat,
I may be a woman who hasn’t done much
I may be a good excuse for you
you, walled up bullet in an empty room
whose life ended in a concrete grave
premature starvation of unaccomplished human tasks
all the while I’m only holding
the universe in my hands
behind silver railings I whisper
lie not to yourself
Its an eternal truth - seeking peace/love in silence ..good poem Axilea
-Hira
I like the juxtaposition between "dark red seconds of eternal dreams" and "songs and words in chipped tea cups". And ya gotta love that inner rhyme in "antidote against narrow scope" which in itself seems like the kind of mantra that one poetic-minded individual might mutter to himslef as a little antidote against small-mindedness. And I think "silver" was the perfect modifier for those railings in your last lines. It's such a cold and prophetic--sounding word with that hiss and vibrating "v"--the color of witches, moonlight, money and ethereal hoverings. Two thumbs up from me. --Charlie
Cheers,
Dan
but I’m holding the love I was given
in dark red seconds of eternal dreams
in songs and words and chipped teacups
... there's such an irony here, Axilea, a pathos, maybe. Certainly more than a match for Blake's "world in a grain of sand". I love the candid, telling detail - almost Plath-like - which, although deftly sparse is absolutely vibrant with visual and emotional energy. That final couplet is chilling with self-knowledge which, coupled with the "walled up bullet in an empty room", makes for a soberingly stark conclusion. Your work continues to strengthen in its concision and fine-tuning whilst wringing to the utmost the weight and worth of every well-chosen word. You deliver your thoughts here with razor-sharp precision and potent emotional accuracy. Am greatly looking forward to more in 2013: all the very best in the coming year. xx
Blessings to you xo
Christine
budd
Regis
Roger