How long you smothered my enthusiasm

and suffocated all hope in the dark grip of  depression
I escaped to my twilight world of pastel dreams
only to escape the prison of your despair

There were times when brief flickers
illuminated the tenebrous darkness.
Those times when you smiled
and patted my head fondly
as a father would a child.
But all too soon you'd plunge back 
into that desolate desert, alone
and I'd crave that fleeting touch
with all my aching soul
and strive to earn it again
- to be the wife I thought you needed
Time after time
you'd place a bit into my mouth
and drive me with your tongue like a whip
until I became like an old mare
ridden beyond all exertion,
flanks stained with sweat
and eyes white with pain

In desperation,
I cried out to God

to free me from this hell,

-your wrath
I begged for liberty
from a life of slavery
while drowning in unshed tears
and choking on hard knots of sorrow

Within, the child tried to be seen
I saw the sunshine in her eyes
Her longing to play again
in wide-open places,
to dance in the rain
and thread yellow daisies
through her long tangled hair

I cradled her faded image
and mourned her demise
as I listened to the wind scream
through twisted branches
Composed,
I played my role so well
and yet
inside
I was screaming too

Copyright Chanti 2001

Read 'Wild Child'  http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewpoetry.asp?id=171213 

There is hope...