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Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

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My Sister's Keeper
by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner → (All Poetry by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
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Dallas D'Angelo-Gary's 'The Second Victim' brought to mind a poem I wrote in 2006, when Karen was so sick.

... going through this, too. ....

Still feel pangs of jealousy when everyone asks about her.

... am i wrong to feel like this?? ....

Image (c) 2006, Karla Dorman


Poem Artwork

hiding in the shadows of
my sister's illness, i wonder
if anyone sees me, hears me
in the darkness of what she
has become:  all eyes on her.

i am my sister's keeper.  been
here all this time by her side -

a how are you, do you need
anything?  would be nice.  i
wouldn't wish this on anybody:
going through this, too.  am i
screaming from the sidelines of

jealousy, wanting attention? 
am i wrong to feel like this??


(c) 2006, revised 2009, Karla Dorman


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 Reviews of "My Sister's Keeper"
Reviewed on July 2, 2009
" ... THERE BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD GO I!"


Reviewed on July 2, 2009
I dont think you are wrong to feel this way, a great poem!
In Christs Love
Michelle~

Reviewed by Dale Clark
Reviewed on July 2, 2009
Not wrong at all, Karla, you are only human and you are a good sister and a good person, which is highly evident to me. Thanks for sharing!

Reviewed by Daring Sunshine
Reviewed on July 1, 2009
I was there! I know you care! You are a good sister without a doubt!
LOL!

Reviewed by Sara Coslett
Reviewed on July 1, 2009
You were probably just stressed out and felt out of control, wishing someone would help you cope. Don't fret. ~ Sara

Reviewed by Phyllis Jean Green
Reviewed on July 1, 2009
Think it is called being human, Luv. You are doing us all a favor when you tell it like it is! Unfortunately, a lot of people don't know what is going on inside of them. Some will throw stones, not having any idea their houses are glass. Thanks for posting this. Even more, for being the kind of person who would write it.
Love always. . .and then, Pea

Reviewed by Gene Williamson
Reviewed on July 1, 2009
Wrong? Never. As always, you're simply revealing
the human side of a multi-faceted Karla. Love, gene.

Reviewed by Michelle Mead
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
No, not at all, I think it is human. People sometimes forget the carer's job is as tough as the person who is unwell. Being the person unwell all the time, I know my Mom goes through alot, as I know Karla probably does, too. Thank you for sharing an honesty that will help others in a similiar place. Blessings and Love, Michelle

Reviewed by Richard Cederberg
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
I am sure that what you've experienced going through this is only helping you grow, and become more efficient, in what God has called you to do. I can tell you from experience, dear Karla, that suffering (no matter what form it takes) is always an inspiration for creating.
Stand strong!
richard

Reviewed by J'nia Fowler
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
Normal and natural and no need to feel guilty about feeling this way. Feelings are not good or bad, they just are. How we handle them is what it's all about. Sounds like some of your visitors were a tad thoughtless. I know of what you speak as I stood for 10 years by my previous husband who had MS. I t was all about him. Love and hugs, J'nia

Reviewed by Joseph* OneLight*® (Reader)
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
Dearest Karla,

You have been blessed by this experience with your sister. Be forever thankful. We grow when we stand beside others.

Love & Light always and in all ways,
Joseph

Reviewed by Sheila Roy
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
I guess that's not the kind of attention you'd want, Karla. But I believe anything you feel is natural, so therefor not wrong. You can't help it. I hear there's a built-in competitive thing going on with twins. lol. The important thing is that you were there for your sis despite those feelings. Hugs,
Sheila

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
Probably just human, but glad this is now in the past, for both of you.

Reviewed by Georg Mateos
Reviewed on June 30, 2009
Your sister's keeper, be glad she was all the time so near you, needing you, loving you, some of us aren't that lucky.

Georg


Reviewed by E T Waldron
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Karla, it's natural for us to feel like this after all we are vulnerable have our own pains etc, yet we seem forgotten while caring for another. The thing is you stayed by her side and that's what counts, because those other feeling pale in comparison to what you would feel if you didn't help her. You'd never forgive yourself. It's good to get the feeling of neglect out so others can be reminded not to forget we all need care.

Love and prayers,
Eileen

Reviewed by Lori Moore
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Sounds natural to me. Well done.

Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
not wrong but human--what a beautiful thing to be able to express this and brave enough to share it!

Reviewed by K. Mulroney
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
The one taking care of another so sick also needs care. When every nerve is on call, when every second of your day is unknown, who would beseech you the quietness and comfort of an arm on your shoulder and a shoulder for your weary head? Wrong? No dear friend, not wrong, just in need of some good old fashion caring. After all, you are watching your sister stay ill. How devastating that has to be. Stop questioning yourself and find a soft shoulder connected to one who can see the pain in your sad eyes. I live in Illinois and I have very soft shoulders. I talk to much but you'll get over it, I make chocolate banana parfaits! Sugarfree!!

Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Hi Karla, You are not wrong! When one is suffering, their is someone else at their side that is suffering, also, and needing attention and relief. You always pack a mighty punch in so few words, Karla. Stay strong, my friend. Thank you for sharing...

In Spirit,
BeD

Reviewed by John Flanagan
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Karla,
No need to feel guilty, we do these thinhs, we feel this way, the reactions and emotions are natural and you're honest enough to convey and share them.
John

Reviewed by Jms Bell
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
YOU USED A SMALL AMOUNT OF WORDS TO EXPRESS YOUR TRUE FEELINGS IN THIS WORK, WHICH IS DONE VERY WELL. IS IS WRONG TO BE HONEST? I DON'T THINK SO. ENJOYED. THANKS FOR SHARING AND BLESSINGS. JOYCE

Reviewed by Jon Willey
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Karla, the first analogy that popped into my mind, was the song, "Wind Beneath My wings" -- I do not dwell on attention -- I am a task driven individual that gathers my rewards by succeeding in whatever task I accept -- so I cannot give you a definitive answer --or even an intelligent guess -- all that I would ask, is what was the feedback from my soul -- did what I performed for my friend, family, or stranger for that matter, make a positive difference in their life -- if so, I was justly rewarded -- peace and love my dear friend -- Jon Michael

Reviewed by Paul Berube
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Our feelings are our own regardless of what they are and why we feel the way we do. That is your right. God bless.

Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Indeed, Karla! There are those that notice, but often they don't say anything right to the point ... they will sometimes allude to the knowledge. When I noticed, I went directly to Annaliese and read her the poem. She was in tears, also, realizing that it was okay to feel this way, and that someone had noticed.

I have another that I'll look up for you. I had to vent my own frustration because, although I was Adrianne's caregiver, I was Step-Dad, and not the real father. Washington does not recognize step-parents as legal guardians. The father that had abandoned them when the illness first occurred would have been able to give permission for her medical procedures, but My wife had to be constantly called to verify, often delaying procedures for dangerous lengths of time.

Reviewed by Patrick Granfors
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
You are not wrong you are human. Felix is spot on. Be well Patrick

Reviewed by Cryssa C
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
All too often I think we all tend to "forget" about those who are in the silent background offering the support...a good reminder to not forget...
Cryssa

Reviewed by R Beeman
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
this is just an expression of thoughfulness for love and friends. nothing to feel jealous about at all. well said.

always,
randy

Reviewed by Cindy Tuttle
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Karla, No it isn't wrong at all. People who help others when they need it also need support.

With Love,
Cindy

Reviewed on June 29, 2009
No it isn't wrong for people to ask about you; I get angry when they don't. Even though I am doing much better now (thank GOD!), I am not as I was, and you still have to take care of me, worry about me. I wish people would realize the trauma my illness brought you and the stress you faced, and still DO face. Excellent write; glad that is behind me now! Very well penned frustration; brava!

(((HUGS))), much love, and many prayers~

As always, your twin, Karen Lynn. :(

Reviewed by Felix Perry
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
All too often when under stress, worry and overtired conditions and when a responsibility is thrust upon us...we are unprepared for the physcological trauma of the event. No one notices the caregiver...only the caregivers absence...I know I have been there a few times.
Fee

Reviewed by Ed Matlack
Reviewed on June 29, 2009
Your feelings are your own & you are entitled to them, if they are jealousy or envy, then that is what they are...ed


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