AuthorsDen.com   Join | Login    
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    BOOKS    SAMPLE CHAPTERS    AUDIOBOOKS    eBOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    VIDEOS    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  Bob mitchley #shock stories, iTracey Morait, iChristine Boyce, iMORGAN ST. JAMES, iJoy Pedersen, iMargaret Mullings, iEdie Batstone, iPamela Ackerson, iNeenah Davis-Wilson, iBob Boze, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry        Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry        Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

Rebecca Lerwill

 Follow Me  

· Contact Me
· Books
· Articles
· Poetry
· News
· Stories
· Blog
· 169 Titles
· 1,484 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: Jul, 2007

Rebecca Lerwill, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.



Hillary Clinton
by Rebecca Lerwill → (All Poetry by Rebecca Lerwill)
   Rated "PG13" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Follow   Share on Facebook


Poem Artwork

Hillary Clinton – she’s a real busy person
walks up to her husband
and says: “I need a vacation.”
before I’ll be chosen to rule this land.

So they pack up their stuff,
no - not really themselves,
they have people to do this
commonly known as the CIA elves.

The Clintons take a drive
headed due east,
Chelsea, Hillary and Bill
but they never saw the beast;

with antlers out front
and it’s legs in the air,
it hit the car hard
and died in despair.

Changing lanes way too fast
Bill headed right for the edge
he means to hit the brakes
but his foot slams down the gas.

Pluming toward their death
it takes ‘em a while,
and Hillary screams her last breath
the car’s just in a pile.

So they get up to heaven
through the pearly gate they walk.
Bill wants to be forgiven,
but Hillary is quick to talk:

“You God damned Redneck
look what you have done!
Now the Republican’s will get it,
the Presidency - I want to run.”

And suddenly He sat there,
their attention was held
by and old man in a chair
with a beard, a robe and a belt:

He asks them a question,
Chelsea gets to answer first,
why she thinks she belongs
in His heavenly herd.

“I’ve been a good student,”
Chelsea begins to explain.
“I never harmed anybody,
never have been a pain.”

God smiles and considers,
nods his head and points to row three
“Have a seat, my dear Chelsea,
you’re as blessed as you can be.”

Now God is asking Bill,
what he thinks the reason
that he can stay here
through all the coming seasons.

“I know I’ve done wrong,”
Bill starts to point out,
“But it was the best I could have done”
he explains to God out loud.

Bill looks apologetic,
the way he’d usually been
he feels a bid pathetic
as God sends him clear back to row ten.

Now it’s Hillary’s turn
and she is anxious as normal
she won’t wait for God to ask her
in a way that is formal.

And before He gets a chance
to ask her so clear,
she bellow’s “Hey God - excuse me!
You’re ass is in my chair!”


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 


Want to review or comment on this poem?


Need a FREE Reader Membership?


 Reviews of "Hillary Clinton"
Reviewed by Jon Willey
Reviewed on January 23, 2008
Your perceptions of the Hill/Billy Clinton clan match mine to a tee. A very well thought out piece of poetry. Jon Michael Willey

Reviewed by George Carroll
Reviewed on October 11, 2007
A great spoof that is so real to life and scares me to think of their aspirations and lust for power, the country be damned.

Reviewed by Annette Hendrix Williams (Reader)
Reviewed on October 9, 2007
This reminds me. I have a poem that I could use which is about the Clintons. I do not think mine is nearly as clever as yours.

Reviewed by Karen Palumbo
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
This is just to good and I am glad I did not pass it up. My face is hurting from laughing.......

Be safe,
Karen

Reviewed by E T Waldron
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
hahahahaha;-) I love it! You have her down pat!Kufo's!

ET

Reviewed by Felix Perry
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
Very good Rebecca, love it.

Fee

Reviewed by Walt Hardester
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
Cheese Louise....How many times do I have to tell people there is another choice...

Vote Libertarian!!!

Walt

Reviewed by ellen george
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
I LOVE this!!!!!!
You are so creative!
Thanks for making me laugh!!
all the best - ellen

Reviewed by Kimmy Van Kooten
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
This is so freakin' funny! ...How true to life you are! She is definitely NOT my vote! I couldn't even imagine what this country would be like having another Clinton in office! "They" say, how you run your family says alot, and being when you marry, the two shall become ONE...and ONE ran off the road in the middle of a double-yellow... and the cheese stood alone...think about it!
sly little mouse..."A Little Jimmy in the Corner, Eating Cheese" LOL!
You inspire me!
Love and Peace~
Kimmy~

Reviewed on October 8, 2007
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!! Laughing too hard to review--all I know I don't want her in--something about her scares me--

Reviewed by larry linville
Reviewed on October 8, 2007
very witty. Even though I will probably vote for her, I think we should be able to have humor with all candidates. This poem certainly goes along the her stereotypes.


New Poetry by Rebecca Lerwill
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  If I Could Be A Super Hero
  2.  Little Folk, Cousins Make A Pit Stop
  3.  Fried Chicken
  4.  Like Ducks in Paper Trousers
  5.  An Adventurous Reinterpretation of Mid
  6.  Milkman's letter
  7.  Laughing As I Flee...
  8.  Amazing Grapes
  9.  Newfangled Things
  10.  A Salt and Batter
  11.  A Writer Named Ron
  12.  Ode to Spamophobia
  13.  Porky Pig And Daffy Duck
  14.  My First Heart Attack
  15.  The Last Second
  16.  Bawdy Stories And A Game Of Bridge
  17.  Houston Greats
  18.  Hound Dog
  19.  AThree Year Old
  20.  Burst Forth
Free Book Review Program
Select a book to read and review today!

A Relief of Doodie: Shtty Stories to Read on the Pot by Jay Horne

Stories Worth Wiping Your A** With Whether you're making a deposit at the stank bank, dropping a return at the squat shop, or conducting a brown business meeting, these perfectly timed tales provide the literary fragrance your privacy deserves. F  
Member BookAds

The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me by Jay Dubya

The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me is adult satirical humor featuring adult language and adult content, and the work is a parody of the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy.  
Member BookAds

Hawthorne: Hazed Hooked Hammered & Hijacked by Jay Dubya

Hawthorne: Hazed Hooked Hammered & Hijacked is adult humor that satirizes 12 popular Nathaniel Hawthorne stories in parody form.  
Member BookAds