I grew up poor, hungry, and angry.
Those were descriptors of my childhood
And the symptoms of my
Underlying malady—
Better known as poverty.
So many friends that I shut out
Of my life;
I could not stand the thought of
Their knowing about my
Surroundings
And my desolation
Although now I am certain
They knew and like me
Did not know how to knock
Over those damned barriers.
Low self esteem haunted
Me throughout my life;
It is the killer of dreams
The agony that will not rest
That ugly gray
Jackass that followed me
Wherever I went.
I remember many
Classmates and the fun
And laughter we did not share
That I would not allow.
One month ago one of them died.
I read her obituary and felt
Pride in her accomplishments
Satisfaction in her family ties
And sorrow that once again
I could not voice them with
Conviction—
We had never spoken.
But this lady that I so admired
Had but two messages in her guestbook
To send her off to see the angels—
One other…and mine.
I love the honest and "real" tone of this poem; and, believe it or not Edward, I can relate to much that you've expressed through your verses here. We were poor when I was a child and I was bullied at school because my parents were immigrants. Thank you for sharing this. Love, peace, and best wishes to you,
Beautiful but sad poem. I have had many of the same experiences with poverty, holding my self back because I did not feel worthy. Then as life went on I started to see through the glow of what others have, or what I thought they had. Not as much as they made out. Loved the ending!
While poor compared to some of my classmates, I was so fortunate to have loving parents and friends that were able to come over to our house and share my mother's and father's kindness. I never looked down at my more unfortunate classmates and neighbors. I stood up for them, befriended them, and included them without concern for their upbringing. I never belonged to the cliques that formed in high school between the haves and have not.
I hope you don't worry about how many people comment on your obituary. Your accomplishments are well known and go far beyond even that woman you wrote about. You are on the cusp of changing history with your economic articles. Whether or not people know it or not and honor you for it is not important. What is important is that you, coming from where you come from, with a unique insight into what it means to be left outside the mainstream of American life. It is your gift and your greatest accomplishment, to have risen from that to become a beacon of light for our economic future.
Incidentally, my soon to be 91-year-old mother, still very sound of mind, has asked me to write her obituary. It is the most daunting writing task that I've faced in a long time. She wants it brief. As you know, brevity is not my long suit. Wish me luck.
This brought my tears, Ed. It should not be so and may God help us to tear down the walls that separate those who should be friends. Beautiful pen. So sorry for your loss.
Up the part where your friend passed...I can sorely identify with most feelings of pain and anger...they say to get over those feelings will cleanse the psyche, but I am stuck with them...never will they pass...-e-
Sadly, my friend, but I relate 100%. But where you hid from your classmates, I tried to hide my sad home life by becoming the class clown, but I excelled at nothing, and spent huge part of my life wandering the streets of America looking for something I never had.
You've penned a sad, yet uplifting paradox, i.e., if one challenges, looks carefully at experiences and the opinions of self and others (growing up) one is often surprised at how seeming negative sensations of the past can unexpectedly enable a positive feeling of the now... even the future. Lovely write.
It unites spiritual wisdom from the East and West to help readers experience Christ consciousness in the here and now. Combining the Oneness teachings of India with a fresh look at the New Testament.
It unites spiritual wisdom from the East and West to help readers experience Christ consciousness in the here and now. Combining the Oneness teachings of India with a fresh look at the New Testament.
John
Regis
I hope you don't worry about how many people comment on your obituary. Your accomplishments are well known and go far beyond even that woman you wrote about. You are on the cusp of changing history with your economic articles. Whether or not people know it or not and honor you for it is not important. What is important is that you, coming from where you come from, with a unique insight into what it means to be left outside the mainstream of American life. It is your gift and your greatest accomplishment, to have risen from that to become a beacon of light for our economic future.
Incidentally, my soon to be 91-year-old mother, still very sound of mind, has asked me to write her obituary. It is the most daunting writing task that I've faced in a long time. She wants it brief. As you know, brevity is not my long suit. Wish me luck.
Ron
Love ya!
Jane