COZY ENOUGH?

“You’ve been spending a lot of time on the internet when you could be writing, mister author.”
“Sure I could if you’d shut up. Every time I settle in to start writing you interrupt, damn it. You’re a fictional character. Let me alone and maybe I can get something good written.”

“One of the things they have been discussing on Dorothy L and other sites you visit is the difference between cozies and hard-boiled mysteries. What is the Nick Bancroft series? Since I’m the protagonist I have a right to know.”

Well, I’m not sure, but surely the bedroom scenes with Maggie are cozy.”

“Yeah right. And don’t think I don’t appreciate being part of that. But what about the murders, the times I get beat up, the crooks, the stealing of tax money? The schemes of the bad guys? Surely that stuff can’t be classified as cozy.”

“Who cares how the novels are classified? Are they any good? That’s what’s important.”

“Too derivative, that’s what one agent said. And what about the agent who said she didn’t like me because I was too lazy. And . . .”

“Too derivative? I suppose she meant they were too much like Chandler, Hammett, or maybe even Mickey Spillane. So what. I grew up on their novels. They were good. If mine are similar I’m honored. Are you through chattering in my head now? Good. I think I’ll take a nap.”