Well, Ladies and Gents,
make no Pretence,

a Bloke name of Andy,
Onct tagged me as Y.D.Dandy!

So, as Two and Two are Five -
would I feed you any JIVE?

Film at Eleven is Handy!

Yankee Doodle

Copyright: 03-15-08 - Tom Hyland

Yankee Doodle Went to Town,
Riding in his Bentley,
To SoHo he did Go, searching for a Ho,
Not so In-no-cent-ly!


Well Guv’nor, she did Say,
In Cash you must Pay -
But do not Dismay,
For then we will Play!


So, this Elderly Chap,
Who Really was a Sap,
Plunked down Forty-Five Hundred Smackeroos
With a Snappy Slap-Happy Slap!


Well, the Feds did of Course,
Take Notice of this Big Horse’s Arse,
A Prior Prosecutor,
As a Tutor - he was a Farce!


Yes, Yankee Doodle went to Town,
This Time - Somewhere in D.C.
As they slapped on the Cuff,
They Got him, sure Enuff - the Rest is History!


As he Arrogantly Resigned his Job,
Doing it with Pride -
T’was Nary a Sob,
With Wifie Dear Nearby his Side!


He enjoyed Silk and Satin,
As he Drove ‘Round Manhattan,
And to Some he was Boring,
‘Til he got caught Whoring!


Is there a Moral to this Story?
When your Hair is White and Hoary,
And you don’t want to be Iconoclastic -
Don’t use Cash - Put IT on Plastic!


Yes, Yankee Doodle Was Bombastic,
As a Role Model, quite Classic -
In the Institution of Prostitution,
He is Now - a Beacon of Preclusion!


Yes, Poor Ole Yankee Doodle,
Had Not Much in his Noodle,
More like Kotton Kandy -
And was Quoted as Saying -
Yank My Doodle - It’s a Dandy!



N.B. - This story is purely Fictional, and
Any similarity to Persons, Places, or Things,
- Living or Dead -
Is purely Coincidental - OKAY?


PONY - FEATHER - MACARONI ?
VS.
HORSE’S ARSE - SATIN - NOODLE ?

Just a Modern, Hi-Tech Update

Like Version 2.0 ?