Surname - Armentrout - his Claim to Fame -
But - What’s in a Name?
Maybe like the Mick - O’s - n’ Macs -
Let us consider a Reversal, or some Redacts!
Could it mean - Son of ‘Arm’?
Or even - Son of ‘Trout’?
It’ll do no Harm -
Let’s Figger it Out!
Trout en arm - could mean Fisherman?
Arm en trout - Really Good - Caught by Hand?
Methinks of Robin Hood - and his Merry Band -
Livin’ off the Land - Catch as Catch Can!
Anyways - Way Way Back in May 26th of ’47 -
A Lil Red-Headed Boy-Chile Dropped from Heaven!
He was Little n’ Skinny n’ kind of - Scary -
So - Dad said: “Let’s call him Gary!”
Out in West Virginy - n’ them thar Environs -
‘Tweren’t much to do - ‘ceptin’ Shootin’ Critters -
So’s - they didn’t Breed many - Alfred Lord Byrons!
But - Cats n’ Dogs - n’ Families - had Litters!
Shootin’ Squirrels n’ Rabbits n’ some Dear Deer -
Gary was a Marksman - Sharp-Shooter - Expert Even?
I’m guessin’ he started with a Twenty-Two - then - 30-30 -
or Thirty-Ought-Six - getting’ his Kicks!
Shootin’ Targets - Shootin’ Critters -
Shootin’ Craps - Shootin’ Cans -
N’ a Pool-Shootin’ Son-of-a-Gun -
Well - I’ll Be - Hot Damn!
Well - this Country Boy got his Education -
Then decided to go - Serve his Nation -
Joined Up - The United States Marines -
Became one of them thar Fellas - Called Gy-Renes!
Did a Tour over in Viet Nam -
Think he was a “Tunnel Rat” -
Don’t talk much about It -
So - That is That!
A Quieter life was his next Stint -
Up in Iceland - Doin’ “Secret Stuff” ?
I ain’t Sure - But here’s a Hint -
Decoding Messages? Like I said - Enuff!
Returned Home - and met his Love -
She - Rosemarie - more a Peace Dove!
‘Twas April 26th, back in ‘Seventy-Five -
Thirty-Four Years - Well - Sakes Alive!
On Twelve-Fourteen of ’81 -
They had a Girl - Not a Son!
Cute Lil Bugger - had her First Breath!
Elizabeth - later Dubbed ‘Beth’ -
Then on Six-Eleven of ’85 -
Along came Eric - Full of Jive!
This Family of Four Struggled -
Like we All do - Finances Juggled!
All this While - what did Gary Do?
Don’cha Know - he went Postal!
Yep - Machine Operator n’ Postal Clerk -
Nigh onto Thirty-Some Years - He’s the Most-al!
A Tough man at Cribbage to Beat -
He’ll Steal your Points - Oh so Sweet!
Always Ready - with a S**t-Eatin’ Grin -
Cut the Cards - Let’s Begin!
Been many a Year - since we played Chess -
He’s a Thinker - with whom you Don’t Mess!
Ponder - Wonder - Think - Think - Think -
There Goes your Queen - Quick as a Wink!
Now - New York Times Cross-Words - we Both Enjoy -
Sometimes his Aid - I do Employ!
“Hyland - you are a Nasty Man -
Find the - Right Word - If you Can!”
Gary’s Mean n’ Lean - n’ a Real Good Helper -
Not afraid of Work - Never Helter-Skelter!
If ever a Project - Need a Hand?
Just call Gary - He’s The Man!
Oh - Yeah - Almost Forgot -
He makes some Mean - Strong Coffee -
N’ drinks it by the Pot -
He likes it Black - n’ Really Hot!
My Sister Rose - who Was a Good-Looker -
Always said: “Gary, you’re a Good Cooker!”
Now I’ve finally Reached the End -
I’m Proud to call Nephew Gary - FRIEND!
Happy Birthday! Gary -
And Many, Many Happy Returns!
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