Even

I was there for you
Even at this historic juncture in your life
Buzzed in to your second safest place
For if there was any sanity
Or this was God’s world
With me would be your first.

I remember wondering where this could lead
Hoping it could save you.
It never occurred to me
You would end us.
It never occurred to me.

I think how I couldn’t see that coming
And I wonder if I should have been there
Without you.
But the dark hand waved over us
Until we were through.

I was not the only one
Who couldn’t see your future.
Like the doctors
I thought it was with me.

When your freedom came
You used it to give me mine.
It was the last thing I wanted
At the time.
But now I’ll take this freedom
And call us even.

John H. Bidwell