Woman Abused…Woman Accused (poem) by J. Allen Wilson on AuthorsDen

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Woman Abused…Woman Accused

by J. Allen Wilson — Read all 1,629 poems by J. Allen Wilson

An event at work yesterday triggered these thoughts and reflections. As I walked in on the backend of a conversation among men gathered during break. I heard one man boldly proclaiming to others how he just slapped the… &%#* out of his wife for not having supper ready on time when he came home from work. He did it with such bravado all the while thinking that he was a man.

Since Leah’s passing, I have spoken on many occasions with a number of ladies on the phone we talked for hours of many things, but invariably their hurt from the past would come out. I would listen and cringe at the ordeals that many of these women endured. In one instance, a young lady caught up in an abusive relationship was beaten almost unconscious by her husband and drug by the hair into the backyard and tied to a tree in the middle of winter up North until she learned her lesson. There are many more cases I could cite, but will not do so for the sake of time. Fortunately these women escaped those abusive relationships which were not always physical, but emotional abuse as well.

However and sadly I know from the time that my wife Leah did volunteer work at a local women’s shelter that many of these women will repeat the same pattern again, and again. They repeatedly take the abuse on the promise that it will never happen again…the men promise to change, but only GOD can change the heart. Ladies…if you are in a relationship like this…you do not have to take this. You are mans equal, not his doormat. And Men…if you hit, or verbally abuse your wife…then you are not a man, but a coward.

I know that there are always two sides to a story and that to have a meaningful and healthy relationship takes work on both parties. Ladies Try to understand your man’s frustrations of trying to make a living in a society in turmoil, and men, try to understand and pay attention to your wife’s issues of the day. They are just important as the ones that affect you. The bottom line is to treat each other with respect, and love all your days. The following poem is one from what I perceive as through a woman’s eyes.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Woman Abused…Woman Accused

What did I do baby to make you so mad?

I love you, but you so often make me feel sad.

I’m sorry that dinner was not ready when you came home.

But I was busy helping your mom today who is now alone.

Why do you cuss me when things don’t always go your way?

Can’t you see that all I do is to love you with my heart every day?

Sometimes I see you get so mad, and all I want to do is kiss away your pain.

Yet…yet you look at me with such disgust, and I feel for me your disdain.

You hit me again last night, and now my eye is black and blue.

Why did you do this when all I ever did was try to truly love you?

You have promised me time and time again that you would never treat me this way.

You told me that you would change, and that you was sorry, but you would still do it the next day.

I often wonder what happened to the man who was courting me.

He was so nice and sweet and tried in every way to simply please.

But after we got married and I gave you all that you want and desire.

I see you lust after others, and in your eyes I see sins burning fire.

I can’t take much more of this…I love you, but my love you dismiss.

How do I tell little David that this is not how a man should grow up to be?

How do I without fear of my life from you truly get free?

I just can’t take anymore of you abusing me….

J. Allen Wilson © 11/21/2009

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Reviewed by Shirley Houston

Reviewed on July 7, 2012

This is a place where I lived! Bravo, poet for shedding light on abuse!

Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan

Reviewed on December 7, 2009

a well written poem giving voice to the abused

Reviewed by Edwin Hurdle

Reviewed on November 24, 2009

Hey Allen,thank you for sharing this poem.The things you said in this poem and what you expressed really hit home.I can honestly say that I really dont respect any man who wants to treat a woman like dirt by hitting her.

Reviewed by Susan de Vegter

Reviewed on November 21, 2009

It takes communication with both husband and wife. In so many cases the husband thinks that to keep an "iron hand" on his woman is the right he has for ruling his house. Once a coward always a coward with any man or woman like this.
Blessings J Allen.
Susan

Reviewed by Cindy Tuttle

Reviewed on November 21, 2009

Allen it is so loving and caring to write this poem.Although not abused as a woman I was sexualy abused three times, wmotionaly and physicaly abused as a child. I think it is so awesome you are standing up for woman. My hat is off to you!

With Love,
Cindy

Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado

Reviewed on November 21, 2009

ANY man who hits up on their woman ceases to be human: to me, they are nothing more than cowardly monsters, lower than a snake's belly in the grass! Such a shame! You may have saved a life with this powerhouse of a poem; very well penned!

(((HUGS))), much love, and continued prayers~

As always, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :( *tears!*

Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

Reviewed on November 21, 2009

(((Allen))),

ANY man that hits a woman is no longer a man in my eyes: he is the lowest of the low. And yet, some of these women have been so beat down, emotionally and physically, that they come to believe (as they've been often told) no other man would want them.

Crying shame - these lines are a warning to those in this situation: get. Out. While you still can. You know?

My ex hit me once: I knocked him into the bathtub. He was okay, but never tried that again. My oldest sis went through this and I wasn't having it. Now did put up with much more verbal and emotional abuse than I should have ... so glad I'm out of it now.

Painfully, sadly penned, my friend. Love shouldn't have to hurt. :( I think the first key is putting God first, and then communication. JMO ...

(((HUGS))) love and continued prayer, Karla.

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