JACK

A chubby young fellow named Jack

Ate nine hamburgers at a whack.

He often said, "Please,Can I have them with cheese?

My hunger just keeps coming back."

BAGDAD BOB

A PR man for Saddam Hussain,

Bagdad Bob was his popular name.

He was OH! such a liar

And with Bagdad on fire

Denied any Yankees had came.

C-PACK

A sleep-apenia patient named Mack

Only yawned when he slept on his back.

He said, "I'll sleep on my sides

Till my yawning subsides,

Then I'll no longer need my C-Pack."

HUSSAIN

A horrid dictator, Hussain,

Threw a war, but nobody came.

His troops all retreated

And he was defeated

But some think he might turn up again.

THE OBSERVER

God sent an angel from heaven
Just to see how us folks were all livin'
Though it wasn't all bad
It made the Lord sad
To learn more folks were takin' than givin'.


IF I COULD BE YOU

If I could be you for a day
Would it change what I think and I say?
Would I then hold my tongue
Before sayings dumb
When I look at the world in your way?


BRENT

A factory worker named Brent
On applying for his retirement
Learned the fund had gone broke
and so the pore bloke
shot his boss and to prison he went.


THE HUSTLER

A charismic young gent,
Who preached about God from a tent,
Took his show on TV,
Saving souls for a fee,
and lived well off of what he was sent.


DAVE

An old tombstone maker named Dave
With no retirement money to save.
Said, "I can keep alive
If I work nine to five."
And worked himself into the grave.

HYPNOTIST

A young hypnotist named Laird

Thought past life regression was weird.

In a trance he departed

To when his life started

And suddenly, just disappeared.

TONGUE-TIED

There was a tongue-tied young man named Fred.
He would do anything that he said.
He always kept his word
Which is kind of absurd,
Since no one understood what he said.


THE ENTREPRENEUR

A great entrepreneur named Dave,
Who was taught while quite young how to save,
Invested his money
When he was just twenty
and he'll take every cent to the grave.