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Alan Cook

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Member Since: Jun, 2006

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Ratings
by Alan Cook → (All Poetry by Alan Cook)
   Rated "PG" by the Author.
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We've all done it.

 

A story is told of a far-distant land
where the people were graded like cuts of meat
from 1 to 10, both women and men,
from the president down to the guy on the street.
 
Now the female 10s liked the men who were 10s,
and as you'll guess the reverse was true .
A 9 and a 9, they got along fine;
an 8 and an 8 were compatible too.
 
But one day a group of guys who were 7s
were shooting the breeze in a local bar.
John said, "A 7 is not really heaven;
I'd like a chance to be a star.
 
"The 10s are stars and they get all the babes;
I wish that I could become a 10."
"You can wish for the moon or whistle a tune,"
said Dan, "but you'll only be upgraded when
 
the 8s and 9s and 10s are gone."
"That's it!" cried John. "We'll kill them all!
And those who survive, each 6 and each 5
will all be upgraded and we'll have a ball!
 
"For we'll be the 10s, we'll be kings of the hill;
the men will admire us, the women will swoon.
So be true to our cause and to hell with the laws;
if we get started now it can happen right soon."
 
They recruited the 6s and 5s and they fought
a war on the 10s and the 9s and the 8s.
And when they were done they knew they had won,
for they'd killed all their foes and settled their fates.
 
So the 7s were 10s and the 6s were 9s,
and the 5s became 8s as you know by now.
And the 10s were kings, they had women and things,
and they didn't question the why or the how.
 
One day a group of guys who were 7s
were shooting the breeze in a local bar.
Ed said, "A 7 is not really heaven;
I'd like a chance to become a star...."

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 Reviews of "Ratings"
Reviewed by pat medlin
Reviewed on April 26, 2010
how fun to read alan...i love your humor style

Reviewed by Jms Bell
Reviewed on April 24, 2010
...AND THE LAST SHALL BE FIRST...AND THE FIRST...NO MORE. GREAT WORK OF HUMOR WHICH REFLECTS ON THE ILLS OF 'RATINGS' WHEN VYING FOR THE NUMBER ONE SPOT TO BE NUMERO UNO. I AM SURE THAT THINGS LIKE THIS REALLY DO GO ON IN THE CORPORATE WORLD TODAY...THEY MAY NOT LITERALLY KILL ONE ANOTHER BUT THE 'GAMES' THAT ARE PLAYED TO GET TO THE TOP CAN DESTROY A PERSON EMOTIONALLY AND FINANCIALLY. WELL DONE AND ENJOYED. THANKS FOR SHARING, LOVE, JOYCE * HIS INSPIRATIONS

Reviewed on April 24, 2010
Alan,

Adorable! Gave me a laugh for the day. Thanks.

Mary


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