A Smidge Of Smut For Flanagan and All Us Other Irish Out There

Flanagan’s Luck And Green Fishnets


There once was an Irishman, J Flanagan by name
who enjoyed every St. Patty’s dae just the same
He sat in his lounge chair and took a good look
at a wee smidge a smut in his poetry book

Oh, His Irish eyes are smilin and his chuckle is deep
if that poem was on TV, they’d give it a bleep

Tha blest time o’ year be upon us once more
To celebrate St. Patty’s with green on our door
Put on a “Irish” tee-shirt and head for the bar
where all the hardy, hard drinkin Irishmen are

we’ll all slake our thirst with deep mugs of green beer
and be thankful for another St Patty’s this year

Now Flanagan is nigh on three sheets to the wind
when he orders another mug a green beer again
He knows he will suffer in the morning but hey
it comes but once a year, Dear Ole St. Patty’s dae

And he laughs and he jokes, singin bawdy Irish songs
for in a pub on St. Patty’s is where Irishmen belong

The barmaid is comely with dancin green eyes
and a low cut top showin assets of some size
Her short skirt to his imagination leaves none
Long legs and heart shaped behind created for fun

That she’s wearing green fishnets and nothing more
‘neath that emerald mini skirt, Flanagan can’t ignore

She bends over a table to serve up some green beer
and to sneak up behind her, Flanagan has no fear

She slaps his face soundly and says with a grin
“Sure you’re a dead man Flanagan, if you try that again!”
He says, ”But Darlin please don’t treat an honest man so”
She says, ”If you can still get up Flanagan, you should go”

Oh the luck O’ the Irish, was not with him todae
but you can bet that Ole Flanagan tries again anyway

He waited and waited ’til the girl turned her back
hoping what she felt behind her would get her into the sack
When she turned round she yelled, “Flanagan how dare?
go crank up the car and I’ll meet you out there”

May the luck ‘O the Irish, rest upon us for life
and when we’re bendin over find no reason for strife


3/11/2015 La Belle Rouge

Music "Wild Irish Rover"