surrounding damage (poem) by jude forese on AuthorsDen

surrounding damage
by jude forese → (All Poetry by jude forese)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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if she could only imagine the aching pulse within my heart obstructing my soul with tired dreams stuffed with life’s daily drama instead, I believe she taking my refuge personally or perhaps blames it all on some artistic disapproval perhaps insinuated but never mentioned departed along some distant highway swirling between lanes of missing images all on the wrong side stifled by distressed metaphor swirling ‘round and ‘round if she only knew how difficult it is to part company while sadness rules dreams when dreams cry out for relief and support but are intensely suspended in chaos and you’re really looking out for her by not touching her with any of the residue circling around you around your tornado of damaged thoughts hopefully reaching the end of their cycle look ahead there's a clear stretch of mile!

Reviewed by Kate Burnside

Reviewed on June 9, 2014

I sure do hope so, Amigo. It's been years it seems since you experienced that new 'clear stretch of mile ahead'. I'm sure it must be more - I could see at least a six miles' sweep of unbroken sandy shore in Tarifa! A beautiful and touching soliloquy which plays on the looking in, the looking out and the looking ahead; the addition of the new final couplet completes your train of thought nicely. xx

Reviewed by Morgan Merriweather

Reviewed on June 2, 2014

Not to be flippant but the chaos is what highlights the very good out of most situations, the challenge is the ability to raise the good, always.

Reviewed by Tiana ~ (Reader)

Reviewed on May 27, 2014

There is always some kind of drama or chaos in life and if we wait for that one clear stretch of mile -- look at all you've missed ... all that time wasted when you could've been together sharing the ride, repairing those damaged surrounding and making it beautiful ... If there is anything I've learned, it's not to waste any more time waiting for that perfect moment when life is drama free. Life's too short, my sweet friend ... Beautifully written, Jude ...

Reviewed by Mr. Ed

A clear stretch of mile often sounds good, as it does here.

Reviewed by Amber Moonstone

Reviewed on May 26, 2014

hey Jude
Two words
Unconditional Love

Peace light and love
Amber

Reviewed by audrine max

it is terrifying to have somoene in your life whom you truly adore obliterate the one thing that infuences your words and wisdom. ambivalence is never ending. astounding poetry.

Reviewed by William Bonilla

Reviewed on May 25, 2014

Your pain is felt in your verses
Peace be with you

William

Reviewed by J. Roseline

Reviewed on May 24, 2014

Intense and touching . You have great artistic style in putting thingsJK

Reviewed by D.T. de Bruijn

I get it, man! I feel like this too sometimes. You really hit the mark there! Grtz, D.T.

Reviewed by Patrick Granfors

We all need our space just to be, but dreams can work better when shared, until the dream splinters with compromise.

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

From what I read, I sense that she would do wise to stay out of the path of surrounding damage caused by that man of her dreams. But then, I'm always wrong.

Ron

Reviewed by John Dyhouse (Reader)

The layout/structure does seem to be very relevant to the message in this excellent poem. Great use of word images

Reviewed by Debby Rosenberg

poetic energy is always so potent for the reader, i appreciate those that do not blast me full of negativity while they vent or unleash and yet i get that poetry can be the means to release the inside out and share life experience. readers and creators are uniquely sensitive in the perception of the giving and receiving - true masters are aware and take consideration in this way - well done here in your expression

Reviewed by Jane Noponen Perinacci

To love someone is to know that someone. I hope time and understanding will "do their magic". Sincerely written.

Love ya!

Jane

Reviewed by m j hollingshead

poignant read, pain is palpable

Reviewed by Sandie May Joyce (Sandie Angel)

Poets express their most innermost feelings, they are often misunderstood by others. Some usually take my words and think I'm talking about them. I have my own life's experience. At most crucial time, may blurt out something, then by coincidence which happens more than often, people think I am responding to their post. We, poets, are the most sensitive creatures, and yet so tender in our hearts and souls.

A good write, Jude!

Sandie

Reviewed by SHERRY HEIM

It is easy to go through life with an "It's all about me" attitude but the reality is that life is truly never all about me. If we wish to share our life with another, we must come clean and share all of our self. If they can't love us, bumps, warts and all, then they will never truly share our life at all.

Reviewed by George Carroll

No sense in unloading your baggage on someone else when it is not the right time.

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton

Sometimes we are at the mercy of self-importance. I know I lean that way every once in a great while.