Daddy got the call of the wild and knocked Mama up with an unwanted child.

Raise yore glasses high to salute me,
The big screw-up that shouldn't be!
Mama and Daddy humped, but not to please,
Then life stepped in to joke and tease.
Nine months later, Mama slapped Daddy in the head,
For lettin him do the Wild Thang in bed.
Well, Hell, Daddy thought that a used rubber would still be good,
Use once and then throw away, Daddy hadn't understood!
Rubber, Rubber, done sprung a leak,
And dumped us all in dookie creek!
Mama had prayed fur life to free her,
So I was as welcome as diarrhea.
So don't tell me to celebrate the day of my birth,
Cause I was an OOPS!, not meant fur this earth.
Rubber, Rubber, why did Ya spring a leak?
Ya dumped me and my kin in dookie creek!