What has the power to awaken me now
from the dark dream that has become my life?

Even your voice beckoning fails to rouse me,
for I know it is mere illusion,
 
a sleep-deprived mind resigned to simple
wish fulfillment,

a lovelorn heart grasping at straws, desperate
to feel a part of this experience they call human

when I never have.


Oppressed by circumstance beyond my control,
I suffocate, pulled under and under again.

And love? Love that ought be light dims and dulls,
and my skin aches from lifelong lack of touch.

A heart already receded concedes its inadequacy
and floats in oceans of soul, layers of tears.

Sleep seizes me, and I curl into an imaginary womb
to dream of new conceptions.

I wait to be reborn.


But nothing can nudge me
through the birth canal, for all I hear

is your voice and I know it is a trick.
And I am afraid, for I have lived

one life too many without people
who would love me back.

My embryonic tissue begins to die
as life squeezes every last drop of pain.

I suffer yet.


A failed experiment, I pray to Creator
to redeem this tired life and take me back

where I belong.