This is old one from May 2001 in story form, but Katy asked for it

My mother loves to entertain, and we always had company coming and going. The men in the livingroom listening to my father's new "Hi-fi." The women sitting at the kitchen table laughing and talking about the sales at Macy's and Gimbel's.

Me, being so small, I'd love to help. I'd go into the livingroom and ask the men "Can I get you some wata"? (I couldn't say "Water") Oh they thought that was so cute. "Sure" they'd say. This ritual went on every weekend.

No one paid any attention as to how I was getting the glasses, because the men would hand me whatever glass they were drinking from for refills, and figured I was going in the kitchen and getting the "wata" from one of their laughing spouses.

One day, the "wata" wasn't too cold. No one had ever asked me for ice before. I can fix that, so I went to the kitchen and politely waited until there was a lull in the conversation and asked, "Mommy, can I have ice?" She was busy at the stove or something, and started talking again. Absent-mindedly, she turned to answer, "For what?" but she didn't wait for my reply. Shut her up, give her the ice was her demeanor. I got an ice cube in a napkin and was shooed. After all, it wasn't unusual, it was summer and it was hot.

Back to the livingroom I went with the ice. It was stuck to the napkin now. My uncle saw me struggling to get the napkin off, but it was melting, and making a mess. He didn't want me to be eating a soggy napkin. "C'mon" he said. We went to the kitchen for a new piece of ice.

The women looked annoyed at a man trespassing on their domain (I know, I know, but this was back in the 50's). Anyway, my uncle had to tread water and ask one of the women for another ice cube, cause I was about to eat napkin, and he surely wasn't about to say "excuse me, move over" and get a turn at the sink to wash it himself. I am thinking to myself, but I don't want the ice, it's for the "wata" He wanted to ease the tension and the air thick with scowls because he figured the women thought he was going to ask for something to eat, so he says, "Sure is hot, thanks for all the cold water girls" His exact words, I will NEVER forget them.

Oh why did he say this? "Marilyn is gonna be a great little hostess, she's so helpful" "Honey, are you telling that cute little (why did mom's always refer to things as "cute little")? Story that you learned in school about Fuzzy and Wuzzy?" "Marilyn, you have a story?" uncle John asks. The ladies began to continue with their conversation with each other, while my uncle and mother continued theirs.

My mother peeled the soggy napkin off and threw the ice into the sink. "Why not give her a pitcher of ice water and I will help her bring it in, so she doesn't have to make so many trips?" Uncle John said. Mom's distracted cause she wants in the conversation with the ladies, and asks Uncle John "trips?" (continuous chattering amongst the women) "For water back and forth" my uncle says. "Water...huh?" Mom replies. It seems as if these ladies have 4 way hearing, and can decipher what other conversations are taking place while they are talking, cause suddenly like a round of Row, Row, Row Your Boat, the voices stopped, one by one. Not only did these women have 4 way hearing, but they instantly pieced together what had been taking place.

It sounded like a six alarm fire was in progress and each lady was in charge of her own siren. Screams and hollering, falling and banging on the table, cups were dancing on their saucers, spoons were flipping. The salt, pepper and napkin holder fell. The tablecloth got crooked as my Grandma banged and got her bracelet caught in the lace. Tears, and ROFL(their asses)O.

Was this funnier than Fuzzy and Wuzzy? I'm not sure, but it did give a new meaning to "toilet water" around my house.


The men splash
The women spray
It was from the bowl either way.