The Virus Queen and Other Tales from here and There
The Virus Queen
These days there's a nasty virus,
As nasty as an angry walrus;
It is COVID-19,
The vile Virus Queen,
Of spreading death, she is desirous.
In the Town of Yarrow
When I went through the town of Yarrow,
I met a young lass named Farrow;
She was sweet and sassy,
Down-to-earth yet classy,
Moreover, she ate like a sparrow.
A Lady with Sheep
There once was a lady with sheep,
Thus, she could easily get to sleep;
She counted on them,
Each one like a gem,
Why some could even drive her jeep.
A Fellow Named Chuck
There once was a fellow named Chuck,
Who said he did not give a duck;
When I asked him why,
He started to cry,
And told me he was down on his luck.
A Gal from Helsinki
I once met a gal from Helsinki,
Who told me her name was Pinkie;
She was loads of fun,
She’d once been a nun,
Moreover, she was a bit kinky.
A Gal Named Anna
I once met a gal named Anna,
Who wished to smoke marijuana;
“It’ll make me feel good,
As I know I should,”
She said as she took my banana.
A Lady Named Babs
There once was a lady named Babs,
On whom I was told to keep tabs;
By her partner no less,
Who was quite a mess,
Because Babs was obsessed with the Habs*.
*Nickname for the Montréal Canadiens of the NHL
A Gal Named Christine
I once met a gal named Christine,
Everything around her was pristine;
She was a clean freak,
A computer geek,
She showed me how to run her machine.
A Fellow Named Jude
There once was a fellow named Jude,
Whose manners were really quite crude;
He was most impolite,
He would spit out of spite,
Yes, Jude was truly a crude dude.
A Chef from Kamloops
There once was a chef from Kamloops,
Whose specialty were exotic soups;
His soups were delicious,
Veritably scrumptious,
Yet all he ate were fruit loops.
© Régis Auffray
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