When I first posted my piece entitled 'My New Foot Soak' on another internet site, I got a review from a poetry 'bully' who said he found the poem nonsensical, and that poets should write only about things with 'meaning'. I wrote this piece as a response...Just in case you're interested, 'My New Foot Soak' is also posted here on my site. Enjoy!
Some writers have asked
If I can write deep
Take subjects with meaning
And give them new heat
So I thought I would answer
In this here small poem
To show I am literate--
My pieces have form
First, let me say
I’m opposed to the thought
That poetry must be
All uptight and naught
I believe that instead
One should speak out one’s truth
And poetry is means
To do that with couth.
But here I go now
Watch out—it’s next verse
My attempt at becoming
A poet of ‘worth’…
‘An aqua sky surrounds us like a shimmering blanket
Covering our very being.
You are there—as lovely as the wildflowers
That inhabit the field in which we stand.
Together, we tumble
Mixed
Like the tall grass
That sways and bends beneath us.
My joy is full
And I realize now
There was no bliss before you.’
Okay, there it is
A dubious sight
A 'so deep love poem'
Defined like you like.
But it seems to me that
It’s not any better
Than the rest of this poem
And no, won’t be ever
Since it’s not who I AM
So give up respect
And stop trying to keep
Every poet in check!
Want to review or comment on this poem?
Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Reviews of "A Deep Poem"
Reviewed by e e (Reader)
Reviewed on April 25, 2008
That was an awesome poem. A poem can be anything about anyone written anyway.
I really could relate to this poem as writer's struggle to get the meaning of their words to hit the heart of the reader in the same chord...you struck a chord with me!!
Reviewed by Gianetta Ellis (Reader)
Reviewed on March 18, 2008
I thoroughly enjoyed this! What spunk! Way to go...
I like your message and I am one who respects variety. How dull it would be if everyone wrote the same way. There are so many variations of art, reflecting the individualities of the artists. Of course there will be differences in tastes.
I loved these lines especially:
"I believe that instead
One should speak out one’s truth
And poetry is means
To do that with couth."
"You are there—as lovely as the wildflowers
That inhabit the field in which we stand.
Together, we tumble
Mixed
Like the tall grass"
Both excerpts show the beauty within. That matters to me, so much more than "form." Pen on!
Wendi...
I think your foot soak poem was great and I agree that all writing and poetry should be serious. However that being said this poem within a poem that you have just offered up is definatley a stand alone of beautiful thoughts. Please do us the honour of removing it and adding it as a love ballad that is pure and sweet but if not I will also understand and respect your decision.
Each person is but a grain of sand resting beside the sea. This thought sets the tone for Jill Eisnaugle’s latest poetry collection, Beside Still Waters.
Share
Print
Save
Follow
fight for the truth..
^^,
I loved these lines especially:
"I believe that instead
One should speak out one’s truth
And poetry is means
To do that with couth."
"You are there—as lovely as the wildflowers
That inhabit the field in which we stand.
Together, we tumble
Mixed
Like the tall grass"
Both excerpts show the beauty within. That matters to me, so much more than "form." Pen on!
((Hugs and LOve)) ~SilentDream
I think your foot soak poem was great and I agree that all writing and poetry should be serious. However that being said this poem within a poem that you have just offered up is definatley a stand alone of beautiful thoughts. Please do us the honour of removing it and adding it as a love ballad that is pure and sweet but if not I will also understand and respect your decision.
Fee