Blogs by Todd Cheney
Bush Twins Push Bush
9/15/2004 11:51:32 AM
I found out that the Bush Twins (whose names I can't remember off the top of my head) came to my campus today. I could care less.
They came to speak to the Young Republicans club, of which I am no part and never plan on being. But yes, I did walk past the big black van that I'm pretty sure has something to do with their entourage (do they have one?) That van was impressive; I think it might have even had armor plating, and of course it had blacked out windows. Man, if only I could get a van like that. Heck, on the Discovery Channel I even saw a show where they make vans with machine guns! Wow! I'd pay anything for a van with a machine gun; that would rock James Bond's socks off!
If I had a van with a machine gun, I could drive around town, and then, if any gangstas got in my way--WHAM!--out pops the machine gun from the roof, bullets are ricocheting off my badass black armor-plated Dodge Caravan like mad. And then the gangstas see the gun, and they split like nothing else! Awesome. If I ever make a movie, it's going to involve a van with a machine gun that pops out of the top. I can see the scene right now:
EXT. Day -- The hard streets of Anytown, USA
The gangstas roll up in their mustangs, looking all phatty and pimped-out. They have Uzis and AKs, of course, because the gun ban is now exhausted. But it's nothing compared to what MR. X has got in store. JEEVES, his faitful chauffeur, sees the gangstas approaching.
JEEVES
Sir, there are gangstas!
MR. X
Pop the roof, Jeeves, we'll
splatter those gangstas all
over the mean streets of
Anytown, USA.
JEEVES (Pressing button)
Hold on, sir. This will be quite
rough.
After depressing the button, we widen out to an overhead shot of the van's roof. As the gun comes out of the top of the shiny black Grand Caravan, the two halves of the roof fall away to the street and CLATTER and SCRAPE against the concrete behind the van, producing sparks. JEEVES steps on it and the engine ROARS. MR. X manipulates some buttons in a dashboard computer. The gun opens up, and RAT-A-TAT-TATs until all the gangstas run like chickens.
-----------------------------------------------------------
What a cool movie. Can't wait to see that one, and funny too!
TC
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