DOIN’ THE NAG AND DRAG RAG

by Don Wendorf, Psy.D., LMFT

Chorus:

Here’s a little dance lots of couples do,

It isn’t very fun and it isn’t very new,

But if you want your love to sag,

Let’s all do the “Nag and Drag Rag.”

Verses:

Ladies, put your hands right on your waist,

Then you shake your finger in your husband’s face,

Beg him to do chores, just go on, implore him,

Tell him they’re all wrong and then do them for him.

Say he really oughta’ do them on his own,

Then watch his every step, never leave him alone,

Haul him ‘round the floor with all your might,

Gripe a lot, snipe a lot, start a fight.

Fellows, show your wife how not to trust you,

Stall and squall and dawdle until she busts you,

Sit down on your butt and let your tootsies drag,

Wait until she blows like a shrieking hag.

Tell her just to let you be to do your duty,

Then go dilly dally right on your booty,

Dig in with your heels, don’t get off your tushy,

Say it’s ’cause she’s bossy, mean and pushy.

Chorus:

Girls, shove your fella’ all around the floor

Guys, plant your feet ‘til your gal’s all sore

Let’s all cuss ’n fuss or lollygag,

Now you’re doin’ the “Nag and Drag Rag.”

Verses:

Ladies, give a chore to start out the dance,

Gripe he isn’t working ‘fore he has a chance,

Remind him 50 times of the tasks he’s shirking,

Tell him he’s a bum and afraid of working.

Fellows, say you’re on it and then just ignore her,

Don’t move any faster than a dinosaur,

When she’s given up and she won’t pursue it,

Tell her you were just about to do it.

Chorus:

Girls, push your hubbies all over the house,

Guys, neglect your sweeties like a lazy louse,

Let’s blame ‘n shame or be a slothful sleazebag,

Now you’re doin’ the “Nag and Drag Rag.”