A poem about a married Nigerian woman's ordeal with domestic violence and abuse.
I am his punching bag, he punches me at will, he punches me to vent his anger. He does so to douse his frustrations. He tries to regulate my emotions, he entrenches himself fastidiously in my life's branches.
My constant battery is his love's justification. To him, none else could care better, not even my own sacrificial mum. In my secular and public life, his raging jealousy is hardly concealed. I am his only mood swing's spectator, I am enslaved by regular and suicidal threats. I must to his own will remain subservient for my own dear children's survival. Not even my domestic pets are spared. My movement is restrained, every friend of mine is a suspect, and my conversations are thoroughly scrutinized. His watchful eyes are never exhausted by prying. He makes my life a world of suspicion and espionage. My conscience is daily by blame overwhelmed. I am worthless and hardly esteemed, and can on none else rely. I have no better friend or acquaintance than him. My inferior gender is a social stigma, hence I am closeted with his unquestionable desires.
I must please him to the utmost with my food, chores and body; My meals must sate his insatiable appetite with the very best cuisines of his choice. My house chores must be flawless in dexterity for his perfectionist requests to please. At bed time my tits and body curves must gratify and gratify his sexual proclivities, even at my own very expense.
Your poem is an emotional and very poignant portrayal of the lot of women much of the world.
In United States, this condition is often codependency. The woman, for whatever reason, actually likes to be abused even when hurt badly. However, whenever a woman feels trapped when her relationship turns bad, she can break free and get a court order, a restraining order, that may or may not work, depending nature of her husband's condition. Wife beating is a sickness that needs treatment.
But in Nigeria, I can see this happening very often because women are devalued much more, especially in Muslim regions. I feel badly for those women and your poem drives the problem home for me. A very sad commentary on much of the world in the 21st-century.
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In United States, this condition is often codependency. The woman, for whatever reason, actually likes to be abused even when hurt badly. However, whenever a woman feels trapped when her relationship turns bad, she can break free and get a court order, a restraining order, that may or may not work, depending nature of her husband's condition. Wife beating is a sickness that needs treatment.
But in Nigeria, I can see this happening very often because women are devalued much more, especially in Muslim regions. I feel badly for those women and your poem drives the problem home for me. A very sad commentary on much of the world in the 21st-century.
Ron