Now, as for the damn that I don’t give,
yes I’m well aware that we all have one,
but as for mine, let me refer you to my coffee
dark brown, untainted with frills like sugar
as to not sweeten the appetite of thrill seekers
in search of said damn which I do not care to give
devoid of softeners like creamer
unspoiled by mocha’s, caramels, nuttiness or spiced anything
no marshmallows, no foam, no frothy nothing
just like the damn that I do not give.
My damn is the same as my coffee
just take a look there at my cup
never empty, always filled to various levels
slightly warm, smooth, rich and mellow,
allowed to cool naturally with no need for ice
it is my damn and I do not care to give it.

You should see it, it's so frigging cute,
just sitting there on the inside of my mind,
little homebody that it is,
playing with play-doh, making little animal figures
then squishing them back out of shape
to try something new besides animals.
It is my damn,
all dressed up in its best Sunday go to meeting suit
with a little bow tie and matching hat,
prim and proper, polished and poised
holding its propriety, elated that I am its keeper
allowing it to abide with me as it wishes
unwilling to force it out on its own
into a big scary world of people insisting
that it too must be given.

I like the damn that I don’t give
we get along in all the very best of ways
We set the table for high tea, pull out the tea cups,
dust off the doilies, sneeze all over each other
eat a bag of cookies and laugh at the clocks
making silly jokes, then turn them into poetry
so everyone will know exactly where my damn is,
with me, content to be so and happily kept.
It is my damn and I do not care to give it
for lack of caring for others egos
always in need of validation
after they have noticed that I do not give my damn
to anyone undeserving of such a loyal little friend
who has endured all there was to endure with me
when everyone else just packed up and left
without the first inkling of saying it would be so.

It is my damn and I do not care to give it
so if you happen to see me about
and are hoping to entice me out of it
just forget it
the good lord gave me this damn for life
to give or to keep, it was all up to me,
to be used or saved, it is my damn
happily home, where it belongs, unafraid
or remorseful to be as it is, mine.

Jade Dane Jaspers