(No specific tune, just twang it)

The Coyotes are callin’
They’re callin’ out f’r me
The Coyotes are callin’
They’re singin’ way off key
The coyotes are callin’
It’s a quarter after three
The Coyotes are callin’
They’re chowin’ down Fi-Fi

We moved to the suburbs, to breathe the fresh clean air
We moved to the outskirts, the land was cheap out there
No fenceline marks our acre, our neighbors we don’t know
The run-off from the septic tanks scents the mornin’ dew

The folks that came before us, found the lion cubs
They took them in and raised them, all in innocence
They have videos and pictures of them playing in the yard
The kids, the dogs, the lion cubs, all har-mon-i-ous

The cougars they remember the kindness they received
More accurately they recall the food they got for free
The daughter found Spot in pieces, the first week we were there
My children all were traumatized and in a doctor’s care

Chorus

The cougars and coyotes, they eat the neighbor’s cat
The rabbits and the gophers eat my garden that
I planted to get back to Mother Nature and her ways
Now my garden looks like a Stalag, with a chicken wire haze

Indeed I’ve learned a lot about the nature of the thing
The proper role of life and death and what nature often brings
The Balance of the Real World might not conform to law
And that a beer can on the muzzle reduces a bullet’s noisy yaw

The cougars are protected, the coyot’s have their champs
Who tell us all ‘bout the need for a predatory ba-lance
But Man's the only killer that this suburb really needs
‘Shoot, ‘n Shovel n’ Shut up is this Yuppie’s whispered plea

The Coyote’s are a’callin’
but they keep their heads down low
The Cougars are safe for now
Except the old and slow
The Coyote’s are a’callin’
To life and death and fate
The Coyote’s are a'callin’
From where I set the poisoned bait