Let's pay homage to the redneck man
Who only smokes Marlboros
And chews tobacco
From the can.
Wears jeans and a t-shirt
Doesn't even own a suit
And when it comes to cuss words
Uses something stronger than "Shoot".
Owns a bass boat
So he can fish all night
Suggest he buy a sailboat
He'll punch you in the mouth.
Drives around in a pickup truck
A dog in the back
Is proud to fly the American flag
And always owns a gun rack.
Loves to watch wrestling on TV
Football and the two BB's
As for watching soccer
He thinks that's for sissies.
Will only consider a Harley
No Hondas or Yamahas
Doesn't like to wear a helmet
But will if told to by his Ma.
Likes to go four-wheeling
In a jeep or all-terrain
Go-carts and dune-buggines
He looks at with disdain.
He usually has a beer gut
From drinking all that beer
Claims its his tool shed
With a smile that looks like a leer.
But if anyone's in trouble
He's the first to offer help
And if anything needs fixing
He's right there with his tool belt.
You'd think he's a real he-man
From all his macho posturing
But all in all, you have to say
He's the backbone of this country.
Dedicated to all the rednecks of America! God Bless them all!
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Reviews of "Ode to the Redneck Man"
Reviewed by jane quigly (Reader)
Reviewed on October 10, 2012
There is a missing apostrophe, should read, "Claims it's his tool shed." Would like it better if the title were changed to "Ode to the American Dirtbag."
Great poem!! Not into guns and the smokes had t'go {least I quit, too}, but me hubby's an Arkansas bow-wi th'oo-&-th'oo. R e a l good ol' boy!:) Ejicayshun cain' roon one!! Thanks for the fun write. Now go set on the po'ch an' watch the worl' go bah. :) Pea (: <3 PS: Guess you've heard the one about the rich Georgia boy. Got
t w o cars up on blocks. ;)
Thank you for an uplifting tribute to redneck men. Course us'n wouldn't be that a-way if'n them redneck female-type women wouldn't be all charmed by it.
The Wholly Book of Genesis is a humorous satire on the first book of the Old Testament where the Story of Creation, the building of Noah's Ark, Sodom and Gomorrah and the families of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob are thoroughly spoofed and broadsided.
Thirteen Sick Tasteless Classics, Part II is adult literature featuring adult language and situations that satirizes thirteen famous novellas and short stories. It is Jay Dubya's sixteenth ebook.
--a fellow Southerner
t w o cars up on blocks. ;)
You just described 98 percent of Muncie Indiana. No kiddin'!
blessin's
cynth'ya lewis reed
Hugs,
Victoria
Sandie Angel :o)