This may strike you as a bit mean-spirited. Especially coming from someone as vain as. . .forget I said that. For all I know, if I were rolling in dough, I'd be burning a path. . .forget t h a t. Do think things have gone too far. Seem to be headed from the ridiculous to the
terrifying. Meanwhile, millions are starving. Time to get a grip! ~~~ Thank you for being here. Your reviews and messages mean more than I can say. Very presence! ~~~ Pea ;)
Nipped, Lifted, and Tucked {sp?}
Do not believe Hollywood. Even Bev Hills teeth and skin rot. All the product at Dreamworks cannot keep hair alive. Mask and bodywork for entertainment only. Consult your attorney, stock broker and guru before you go under knives or give in to a needle filled with poison. DAH-ling, even fashionistas die. By all means, repair for repairs. Hell, out with the old, in with the new. Got the bread and don't mind forking the equivalent of the pyrotechnic budget of a stud- studded extravaganza. Plastic surgeons and stylists deserve to live it up. Look how they Care.
Considerations to ponder in your Gulfstream: Mud they slather tres, tres dear. Dust to dust BO-rinnng. Did you know the sand comes from a South Seas isle so remote, takes helicopters and jet-skis? Heat it with an ingredient so precious, have to kill us if they tell. Outer Mongolian stream provides water for the steam they use to powder bone from the ignoglamorpus. Lives in the mountains of Opium. Whip it with blood, tallow, wormwood, and a red seaweed goo called yuk, get the wrap they wrap. Meantime, Fate is catching a breeze between 6-foot digs. All that huffing and puffing and polish- ing and buffing is taking place over plates that shift. Don't look down. Core looks hot as, well, hell. Get visions. of make-up artistes in funeral homes painting and fidgeting with the Do Filing, tinting. Who said Why not cut to the chase?. Shoot fire, stylists would be invading birth suites. Set up in utero! See a 7-pounder gliding down the runway. "Ta-DA!"
Betty Davis once said, "Old age is not for sissies." Let the nippers and tuckers do what they will. I may not like it, but I'm tough enough to ride it out.
Yes, there are areas I wouldn't mind tucking. I have a couple of things that need lifting, but I don't want any knives near the twins, if you know what I mean. So, maybe I'll repair the stretched belly from bearing two kids and delivering them without means of labor and/or pushing to bring things back into place. Maybe, but then again, maybe not.
Written with the seriousness of one who's faced that mirror and asked, "Who stole my body and left me with this thing?" Yes, faced it and walked away knowing that your mileage makes you a queen. An emperess. Miss Universe. When the nipping and tucking goes south, it's much, much worse.
Reviewed by Hanley Harding (Reader)
Reviewed on April 17, 2006
My ex-girlfriend (but still friend) has had more cosmetic surgeries than I can count (our inside joke is that I have a deed to one of her breasts). As she was coming out of an outpatient "touch-up" procedure -- I, holding her hand -- she whispered, groggily: "I'm SO vain." She is... but WHAT a gal!
enhancements...refinements...breast enlargement...breast reduction nipples-cut-off-stored-in-a-jar-reattached...johnwayneBOBBIT's-penis-severed-by wife-threw-it-in-a-bush-police-had-to-retrieve-to-sew-back-on-viagra-to-rise-again-now-johnwayneBOBBIT-pornstar...phyllisdiller iron-out-hollywood-wrinkles-dye-job-comedy...cher botox-puff-lips-I'd-like-to-kiss...georgehamilton bronze-tan-butter-the-celebrity-hunk-toast...dollyparton smokey-mountain-canyon-climb-cleavage-RHINESTONE dream...mannequin-anatomically-correct-enhanced...is it live or is it MEMOREX!
LOLOLOLOLOLOL...The ending is just too much, Pea...you had me smiling and laughing through the entire read. I have to agree that there is far too much pressure put on us to look...well...perfect all the way to the casket. Who will pay hundreds of dollars for "hope in a jar???" No poochie cellulite allowed on our thighs, no jelly butt, no Samsonite duffle bags under our eyes, no jowls allowed, breasts must be at a high salute at all times, feet must have a pedicure or don't dare wear sandals, manicure every other week, a fresh Do and dye, and do stop by the plastic surgeon to see about doing something about that bit of under arm sag that is beginning to show..sigh...who has time for all this???? I am far too busy living to have time to be worrying about this stuff. Great write, Pea!
LOL at Constance Gotsch's remark..."cashectomies". AIN'T IT THE TRUTH. Not mean spirited, not my Sweet Pea...just bold and truthful. I love this write--this beauty thing has gotten waaaaay out of hand. Why can't people accept themselves for whom they are? I love me for me. 'Nuff said. Every wrinkle, every grey hair...I'm proud of it. It means I've lived one more day. :) Well done, my friend, well done!
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. *more (((HUGS))) and prayers*
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)
Reviewed on February 18, 2006
Gotta love it . . . And I do. This whole "let's all be beautiful" show has almost gotten competely out of hand. Now it is where us common people can go under the knife just like our idols. Would never do that. Good.
Fantastic Pea...Everytime one sees what Michael Jackson let happen to himself under the knife,it should make them think more than twice. He is a nightmare gone even more horrific in my estimation and such a terrible promo for the nip tuckers! Yet everyone still runs to them in hopes of being forever young and beautiful. They never stop to think that they don't have forever;-). Excellent Pea!
Blod Ties - Fantasy, Romance. Romantasy? A bit of whimsy for the weekend. A naive British tourist John Gormley takes a holiday in the ancient, remote kingdom of Perarboria. He does not suspect that his holiday love affair with a local beauty is desti
Thirteen Sick Tasteless Classics, Part II is adult literature featuring adult language and situations that satirizes thirteen famous novellas and short stories. It is Jay Dubya's sixteenth ebook.
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Enjoyed the reading of "Nipped, Lifted, and Tucked {sp?}"... An outstanding depicting of the illusion keeper's society.
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
Yes, there are areas I wouldn't mind tucking. I have a couple of things that need lifting, but I don't want any knives near the twins, if you know what I mean. So, maybe I'll repair the stretched belly from bearing two kids and delivering them without means of labor and/or pushing to bring things back into place. Maybe, but then again, maybe not.
Written with the seriousness of one who's faced that mirror and asked, "Who stole my body and left me with this thing?" Yes, faced it and walked away knowing that your mileage makes you a queen. An emperess. Miss Universe. When the nipping and tucking goes south, it's much, much worse.
It's pathetic. I wrote a poem called
Fake Grin sort of says the same thing.
Peace and Blessings,
Carolyn
Hugs,
V~
Your gliterati friend,
Ms. Sage
love and peace...Carole
Paul;-)
No Knife will ever move me to chop me up just to look different...I will still be me!!
The only lift I need is for my feet...as long as I am able to lift them I will walk the walk for life!!
Love Tinka
Felix
Jill
Take care,
Sherry
LOL at Constance Gotsch's remark..."cashectomies". AIN'T IT THE TRUTH. Not mean spirited, not my Sweet Pea...just bold and truthful. I love this write--this beauty thing has gotten waaaaay out of hand. Why can't people accept themselves for whom they are? I love me for me. 'Nuff said. Every wrinkle, every grey hair...I'm proud of it. It means I've lived one more day. :) Well done, my friend, well done!
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. *more (((HUGS))) and prayers*
Eileen