Hungry for a laff? Hope this whets your
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I confess to all the usual writerly addictions:
Pencil erasers, blank books, 20-pound bond, Roget’s
thesaurus, and staring for hours in no direction,
But they do not keep me from feeling that I am OK.
There has to be a group helps you get over Cool Whip
and the 3 CH’s, chocolate, chips, and cheese.
I don’t think it is normal to stockpile cheap lipstick.
Tree-hugging’s one thing, but who kisses trees?
I am sick of scratching my head when no one’s around.
Do I have OCD, ADHD, or am I just a flibbertigibbet?
I am a seriously, seriously addicted clown.
If there is ice cream within a mile, I will nibble it.
If reading in bed is bad, I am doomed forever more.
If craving kisses from a dog is a no-no, woe, woe is me.
I never used to hide People and The Enquirer before.
Got enough hair color to dye Bed-and-Bath’s sheets.
I have to have – I mean, have to – my toenails painted.
I will hook before I will give up AC and central heat.
With Pepsi, experts would say I am over-acquainted.
I don’t think there’s a rehab for people like me.
I have to go now. Law and Order is coming on.
Not that I’m addicted, but step away from the remote.
Who knows what else I’ll be hooked on by dawn?
Oh, well. Happy Farm ain’ bad. (Signed, I.M. Broke)
Phyllis, until you are dashing about the streets with a maniacal stare and armed with bubblegum and Pop Tarts, I am not concerned. We all wear some pieces of the clown's attire. It is a vent, a diversion from the pain of society's lemming like rush to oblivion. With a smile and a clown's shtick you have unleashed a mountain of seriousness. Oh, and please pass the milk and Hostess Twinkies. Love and peace to you my dear friend. Jon Michael
This poem is filled with laugh after laugh. It is so hilarious I think I can safely go pee now. LOL But you are right aobut one thing though. There definitely is no group that I know of that can help addicts like us. LOL. Or is that was cardiac rehab is for? Oh well, just so you know Pea, I did really laugh a lot reading this poem, and now I need to go visit the little girl's room. Thank you sharing.
May the Lord Bless you, and those whom you love, and be with you always, and walk by your side. With love in my heart, joy to the world, peace on earth, & ((((((((((MANY WONDERFUL SISTERLY HUGGGGSSSS)))))))))), your little sister Barbie.
Reviewed by Chantilly Lace (Reader)
Reviewed on October 4, 2010
Oh my... I almost peed my pants sweet lady ..LOL.....this is great..take care OK..Hugss
I became addicted to the "house" series and found myself mimicing the cynicism unconsciously, and then consciously. I don't do toenails but I'm with you on the old AC. Got my early morning doggie earwash too. Patrick
Hey Phyllis this is really very funny and entertaining! I know where you're at, perhaps I should try to write one from a blokes perspective, LOL. Cheered me up, thank you.
Best regards
David
Goddness you are creative in finding way to tickle. Ice cream, cookies, and my old stand by M&M's never go anywhere without having all in reach. For me, pepsi with a twist of chocolate syrup topped with a nice helping of Redi-Whip keeps me smiling all day long. What a joy!
You're on a roll, Pea, a delightful light roll but with depth, too; there's always an underlying seriousness and great truth in you
and as ever, I love how you deliver.
John
Reviewed by LadyJtalks LadyJzTalkZone (Reader)
Reviewed on September 23, 2010
thanks for the laugh, who can say when we cross that line, cute read and write
"I will hook before I will give up AC"...come with me honey, I will introduce you to the Old West Madam where AC is the tumbleweed blowin' just driftin' in...painted ladies and a bottle of cola spiked with Bad Example Always Serve it! Dye-yer-hair-clown-red cuz the clientele can see you comin' for miles...where Roget's thesaurus isn't but a slateboard with colored chalk tie-dyin' colorful language the way you do, Pea...it's a keeper, what would ya say if I tol' ya there was no Law an' Order?
Homer's Ill Iliad & Odd Sea Odyssey (420 pages) is an adult satire/parody rewrite of the classic stories of the 10 year Trojan War and of the 10 year adventure of Odysseus trying to return home to his native Ithaca.
A humorous look at the world and life through my eyes.
Follow the author and his wife, as they travel the world …. several times over.
Laugh at their funny stories, self-inflicted crazy events, strange observations, wacky zoo facts and snippets
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May the Lord Bless you, and those whom you love, and be with you always, and walk by your side. With love in my heart, joy to the world, peace on earth, & ((((((((((MANY WONDERFUL SISTERLY HUGGGGSSSS)))))))))), your little sister Barbie.
Best regards
David
Ron
fee
Be always safe,
Karen
and as ever, I love how you deliver.
John
GOD BLESS YOU
TONY
Love,
Sage
I would too! LOL!
Enjoyed this~
Love and Peace~
Kimmy~